She has been somewhat lethargic of late, doing nothing but eating and sleeping, building her fat reserves for winter. Then the other day, she came alive and wanted to play and race about. She is such a bossy cat and likes everything her own way. So like the Duke of York - When she is up, she is up and when she is down, she is down. And everyone has to flow with her. I like to flow against her occasionally and ripple her tides up a bit. Poke the bear, run the gauntlet, wake the kracken, tease the troll. Call it what you will and do it at your peril!
Here is a fine example of the 'way she is'. Racing up and down the cat post having her bottom smacked with the Sunday magazine. It is just the right weight and texture for a good slapping of da arse. It makes a wonderful noise on semi furred behinds and taking after the great King Slinky himself, Lillibet is the next best arse to slap. She hunkers down, head buried in the scratcher, butt in the air, taking the slapping, spinning about and dashing up and down, chirruping, whilst Momma sings the slapping song. "Oh bitty (slap) your so fine,(slap) your so fine (slap) you blow my mind (slap), Oh Bitty, (slap slap slap) Oh Bitty" (Slap slap slap). She then gets so giddy she then has to run about to expel all the energy the slapping has produced.
It is then we all watch with amusement as she trots across the kitchen table to the radiator boxes where Faith is lightly dozing, allowing the warmth to rise into her face and toast her whiskers. Lillibet arrives with a flourish and falls into the box next to her Mum. Bum in the air, tail all askew, mewling and chirruping. writhing about trying to get comfy she comes up for air and mewls sweetly to her Mum. Faith kisses her, Lillibet tucks her head under her Mums chin and presents her face for washing. Then she is off again for a thunder around the house and returns seconds later with more pitiful sounds that make Faith so maternal. Faith again washes Lillibets upturned face. A little nibble of the fleecy cheeks and a wash of the ears and BAM! Lillibet strikes, screaming like a banshee. Taking her left paw and delivering a blow that reverberates around Faith's head and knocks the stuffing out of her kind sweet nature. Again, Thwak. blow after blow and Faith retaliates with a right paw to fend of the powerful beating. It is all too much. Faith hops out of her warm spot and Lillibet jumps right into it and smiles sweetly at her winning streak. One happy diva!
Well, dear Lillibet, let me challenge you to a duel. I am calling for a boy and you are, by far, the biggest, strongest cat in the household. You hold the key to my purrfect companion that looks most like a boy cat! I have sung to you and followed you about, humming and trilling. Rolling and showing you my soft underbelly. But you hold me in contempt. You diss me and I have to go off and call in the hallway for maximum noise impact. I trot down stairs and this noise comes out that sounds for all the world like a Peacock. I then run up the stairs and tell ManSlave there is a Peacock in the hallway and he must come and look - alas. It has flown away!
Pearl gets a bit excited when I start Peacocking. She just now bit my neck and throat so hard I was wheeling about gasping for air and trying to breathe. It is very scary, The last time she did this I had to visit the vets for a numbing and soothing injection because she damaged my larynx. This time, Momma was on hand to break up the sexfest and administer the life force juice that will save my poor larynx a second time. I am now residing in with the Minicats. They are not so rough and they interest me greatly. Their dashing about is such fun and I am super gentle with them. I like to wash them a little bit and sniff their fur and kiss their faces. They like to leap on me, I don't like that. I have a sensitive body and any leaping makes my skin ripple. I shall stay in here until I visit my boyfriend. Poor Otta is a toyboy and neither of us really know what to do. Virgin on the ridiculous you could call it!
Choking a send off this week, I shall give you all a Royal Wave instead and hope it will suffice.
Love from Queen Vee =^..^=