Cats do smile.  Ok, so it's not like a human smile, but we do turn our lips up into a pleased expression when we are having something pleasing done to us, like a kiss or a belly rub.

For a cat to show it's teeth is a bit of a no no really to each other and especially to our humans. Humans don't like it when the cat-sharps come out and yet they constantly show us theirs as a form of love and laughter.  It is quite confusing on occasion and something that always make me think of a time when Faith was a kitten.

Faith loves sugar. I mean REALLY loves it and thinks nothing of stealing anything sweet. On this one particular occasion, she was snooping about on the worktop and came across a bowl of icing sugar.  There it was, all unattended and sweet and luring.  She dived in, sniffer first, licker second and of course as soon as her wet sniffer hit the sugar it started to melt, the licker came out and it made it sticky.  She started to panic, it was oozing from her mouth like a liquid torrent. This in turn made her look like she had a big gaping smile as the white icing sugar coated her lips and teeth and they both in turn gleamed like a pair of Bobby Dazzlers!  It's not something I would ever do of course, so I could only look on with sheer hilarity as this tiny black kitten tried to rid herself of her newly acquired smile.  She has always been a sweet girl!

KS =^..^=

Whilst the Parentals were away, Uncle Paul came and fed us our specially weighed out Noms.  Well, Lillibet and I got our specially weighed out Noms and Faith got something different.  It's quite hillarious really. Lillibet's food was in little bags with her name on and Faith's food was in little boxes. But Uncle Paul got confused with all the little boxes for Faith, because both Lillibet's name and my name were on them too. So Uncle Paul measured out, each day 40g of food for Faith using the little measuring pot.  The funny thing is that Faith was the one on the diet and she ended up getting so much food that her bowl was overflowing when the Parentals came home.  

You see, the measuring pot is for another type of kibble that is much bigger, and the CatWomen's kibble is tiny, so 40g is actually around 90g!  Faith also had wet food at night topping her food allowance to a staggering 175g a day. She was in her element, stuffing her tiny face whilst Lillibet and I looked on in wanton food lust.  Also, Faith's feeding station is in the lower food hut and Uncle Paul can't bend down that far, so we guess he didn't see the mounds of food that were over flowing in the dish.  Momma takes the blame for miss matched  boxes with names. Shrug, "It happens. Every one got fed, what's the stress?"

All I can say is WHY does it NEVER happen to me?  YAWP!

KS =^..^=

Firstly, I would like to wish all my followers a very Happy Easter Sunday and that means ROAST something.  Today was a chook of non heritage, a white meat breeder instead of our usual black leg, but non the less a free range one.  Of course, I Yawped and Yawped until Momma gave in and trimmed fresh juicy bits off for all three of us and fed us all together in a little trio. 

I felt good today on my new meds and thought I could steal a little bit from Lillibet, but she was having none of that and promptly Thwakked me on my head and told me to back off. Faith wondered what all the fuss was about and looked up from her chicken, that's when my paw came out and swiped a piece right from under her sniffer.  Momma poked me in my belly and I did a little hiss at her.  That ensued in a mad chase around the house with me in the lead and then I fell on the bed upstairs and showed my vulnerable undersides for copious amounts of kissing.  When I was suitably recharge with kisses, I raced about the house Yawping and rounding up the CatWomen and making them chase me, the I turned and Thwakked them, Yawped and ran away... as usual, they follow me to the ends of the earth.

I can honestly say that after feeling as sick as a cat on Monday and had me a quickie visit with Simon and he used the FURMOMETER, I decide that I had better feel 100% better or THAT was going to be a regular occurrence!  I was too shocked even to complain that he had done that when Momma said he wouldn't - but sick is sick and FURMOMETERS are needed in such cases.  However, it was concluded that it is a transient side effect of the Atopica medication and I am to revisit in a few weeks to see about reducing the dose and my sickness.

I do feel more like my old self. The naughty, boisterous one! The one who gets into all sorts of trouble and Thwakking competitions and chasing and yawping as well as long purr fests and snuggles with Momma.  I have even been sitting on ManSlave and showing him some love - he is so taken aback that he thinks it's because I love him. He is useful and Momma has been away a few days with Grand Mew Mew and I needed a lap to sit on!

KS =^..^=   

The teasing that goes on in this house is unbearable!  It's gets all three of us wound up and it all starts with the opening of the freezer and the rattle of the fish finger box. None of us can help ourselves and we are alert, even if we have been in a deep slumber.  We start to salivate and our lickers and sniffers are going ten to the dozen. The problem is, these fish fingers take  twenty minutes to cook and that's what drives us to distraction.

Once they are ready, it is our job to make sure they are not too hot for the Parentals by tapping them with our paws. You see if they are too hot, we have to wait even longer for a piece.  ManSlave always cooks six fish fingers for him and five for Momma. Momma's are special wheat free ones! So essentially, if there are six little orange sticks under the grill, that means there is ONE FOR US!  We Yawp more then and dance a merry jig.

Then, there is the undressing of the fishy. It has to be de-crumbed and split into three (although, I have noticed that my share is smaller?) It's put into little dishes to cool.  Now we are at the crescendo of our performance and we can barely hear ourselves think whilst they cool.  Then comes the moment we have been waiting for - the eating!

Well, I am not sure if I had any, I sniffed in and it vanished. I harass the CatWomen for a taste of theirs. Faith eats SO SLOWLY it's painful and even more so because I know she has more than me. Lillibet is delicate whilst eating, but if I approach her she thwaks me on my head. Momma keeps a beady eye on me and I am good and make silly little noises to show that I would love some more.  Occasionally, Momma gives in and I get a little bit of hers too.  

After we have eaten, we all go our separate ways to wash and clean our faces of fish food!  We have what we want - we don't look back and silence is restored once again.

KS =^..^=

You could blame the Parentals but really it's my Licker that has got me into deep doo doo in the health department.  You see, I could blame Momma, but technically she wasn't here all weekend and had measured out all of my food into little tubs for ManSlave to dispense with my pills.  But what Momma failed to count on was the very busy weekend ManSlave had trying to sort those annoying tenants and well, he kept leaving his plates in the sink! My licker is very talented indeed and is capable of getting into every nook and cranny.

On Thursday I had me a little taste of Beef & Celery when the parentals got urgently called to the neighbours and on their return, Momma spotted a 'hole' in food where it lay in the pan! She quickly stirred it and served it up before ManSlave noticed.  On Friday the Parentals were meant to have a romantic Valentines meal of fresh prawns, instead, they ha a quick 40 minute stop at the harvester where we were all treated to a kitty bag of steak, except I was annoyed they had missed our lunch completely and ravishly ate some of the tissue the steak was brought home in! On Saturday, ManSlave had fish fingers for his breakfast, I licked the foil and then went on to lick the frying pan after he made an egg sandwich at lunch and licked the entire sink clean of pizza crumbs and cheese from dinner.  By this time I was feeling rather ill and off colour and in need of the 'Pink Tray'.

I don't know why I do it, but now Momma is home, I have had my drugs reassessed and food weighed out (I get a little more because I have dropped weight) and the sink has been washed out properly and the dishwasher not left open so I can't lick the plates. I also had my bum smacked and I was washed last night and felt totally humiliated because I was caught licking clean forks on the drainer.  There is a new rule in the house now. I am not sure what is it entirely because everytime they talk about this new rule, I am shut out of the kitchen?

KS =^..^=

I actually enjoy my visits to the vets of late, I get weighed in first, have my eyes, ears, mouth and tummy checked, then my ticker gets a good going over. My Grade III murmur* makes me special because you can hear my ticker without a stethoscope, Momma loves to lay her head on me and listen to my cardiac cycle, swooshing and whirring.  I used to cough and wheeze with it and sometimes, I do get a tiny bit tired if I run about too much, but since my new diet, it all seems to be a bit easier and I have more energy and my ticker doesn't sound so loud. 

When I eat bad things, well, things I have stolen or licked (which is NOT my fault) I get a skin reaction, the 'pink tray' is usually required and then my belly swells. It also makes my kidneys swell, especially my right one. Simon the Vet tells me it is possibly part of my reaction cycle as it's only then it happens. If you remember, in the Summer, I did a 'tinkle test' and all came back 'normal'. It's just the way I work I guess.  I am unique after all.

My food is now weighed out everyday, this is annoying as I can't even have a tiny bit more.  I have two types of food, one is a very pricey kibble from Hills in the form of Venison & Pea. If I only eat this, my stools are too big and I can't cope with all that biscuit. I am also STARVING! I am on steroids as well, so they make me feel hungry.  So Momma devised a food that is bulky, yet made of all protein and steralised. Interesting huh! It makes me feel super full and I still get my vitamins and minerals from the hills and I am, for the first time, putting on weight and keeping it!  I weigh a mighty 4.18K. For my family, this is a good weight!

My meal times now go like this:-
Brekki:- 50g protein & 10g hills & 2.5mg Prednisolone  
Treat:- 2 x hills biscuits (the girls get dreamies!!!)
Lunch:- 10g hills
Nom time:- 50g protein & 10g hills & 2.5mg Prednisolone  
late supper:- 20g hills

In these small amounts, I am getting my much needed 'bulk' to make me feel full as well as my daily amount of Hills at the lower end. And, I am not YAWPING! I don't really even ask for food like I used to. Every 5 minutes.  So, my skin is a tiny bit sore on my shoulder, my eye is a tiny bit puffy, but when your body rejects every protein going, I feel this is a good compromise to go forward with. hey, and it's only taken 5years to achieve this perfection and a lot of hard work. I don't require as many baths as I used to and the Malassezia dermatitis** is staying away as is the Urticaria Pigmentosa.*** My kitty colitis is brought on by allergies and these other things I have just get exacerbated by anything I have an allergy to, in and out of my body... and that is even dust, wool, flowers and smells. 

I love being me, I am unique. People have leered at my baldness**** and said some very mean things, but I can't help being bald, it's in my genes. Does it make me any less lovable, nope. It makes me tolerate a heck of a lot of abuse, especially from other Devon Rex owners and breeders.  I am lucky that my original breeder was so caring to find me a special home where I could have all this care and attention from Momma. These things happen - genetics are never perfect - I am a unique and special character who loves fuss and attention - but only to those who worship me!

KS =^..^=
*Grade III—intermediate loudness; most murmurs which are related to the mechanics of blood circulation are at least grade III. - That's me - but I don't have Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy - my test results are negative on that!
** a single-celled yeast that causes ear infections, greasy skin and itchiness, which is treated with antifungal drugs or in my case - anti dandruff shampoo!
*** a dermatological problem that causes crusty sores on the body and is treated with prednisolone and essential fatty acids.
**** Congenital hypotrichosis, otherwise known as hereditary baldness. 

Every Morning is the same... The ManSlave and CatWomen banter in the bathroom!  It goes something like this...

Lillibet "Squeak"
ManSlave "I know what you want"
Lillibet "Squeaaaaaak"
ManSlave "I have to shave first"
Lillibet "Squeaaaak"
ManSLave "Ow!"
Lillibet has hitched herself to his hip and is climbing the towel!
ManSlave "you are gonna slip, Ow, yep, OW..EEEK, OW..."
Lillibet now sitting on the side of the sink helping with shaving, having climbed full length of ManSlaves towel.
ManSlave "Do you want to pull the plug Lillibet" 
Lillibet "Squeeeeeeeeak" (her voice is going) 
There is excitement now and Faith gets down from the radiator with a thud on the loo seat and gets into the shower tray.
ManSlave "Ok, this is it, waters coming Faith"
Faith "Mep mep"
Lillibet "Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeak"
You hear the plug being pulled, Lillibet is on the loo seat (you can hear it moving) Faith is in the shower tray... gurgle gurgle gurgle... the water is running up through the plug hole in the shower and down the plug hole in the sink.  Both girls are ecstatic. Faith picks out the plug hole cover and carries it into the bedroom and leaves it just outside the door.  Lillibet is now after a treat.
ManSlave "Come on then, dreamies time - who wants a dreamies?"
Faith and Lillibet squeak in unison (it's deafening), Lillibet runs to the stool and Faith to the bed and they both balance like Meercats waiting for their treat.
ManSlave "Right, there you go.  Good girls, pretty beautiful girls"
He finishes with their snax and heads back into the bathroom, stepping onto the discarded plug cover.
ManSlave "Those blinkin' cats, you are all a pain in the arse!"

He loves us really!

KS =^..^= 

It's the time of year when the Parentals traipse around the countryside delivering Christmas cheer and hopefully pick us up a turkey from some far fetched free range farm... but this year year on their trip to Wales, they brought back tails of a Seagull?  We were unimpressed with the lack of food they brought back from their short trip and there we were, slavering and waiting for them, to have nothing placed in our paws.  YAWP!


We had been left with Uncle Paul as they were doing a long haul visiting trip and it was cold, so better that we didn't go.  I am not so sure.  At our end we ha our noms weighed out and presented in the usual style and nothing extra.  There is no fooling Uncle Paul, he follows everything 'to the letter' and no deviating.  This is of course, just what the Parentals want for us, but of course, Uncle Paul gives us our four meals a day in two meals a day.  It's feast or famine around here and whilst you are eating double portions at breakfast and dinner, the hunger center inside you still dictates that you are due two further meals.


Well, the CatWomen had it sussed. They decided between them that they would rather eat on the table out of Uncle Paul's hand instead of their dinner boxes.  They really played him like a fiddle and he lapped it up, giving each one their biscuits in turn.  ::Shakes head::  When Momma got back and did night time Noms, the CatWomen sat on the table shouting that they were not getting the same treatment as they had for two days. Needless to say, heartless Momma let them starve and my morning, fading away and with their final breaths, they crawled into their dinner boxes and ate the whole bowl and licked it out! Momma will never be played for a fiddle - mores the pitty!


KS =^..^= 

The smell of Sunday Roast has penetrated our nostrils, normally it's just mine, but the CatWomen are attentive to smells too, now that their senses have moved from pheromones to normal aromas. It's nice not having them sitting on my head and yelling all and sundry at passing tom cats from the window.  The place is quite quiet and we are all in companionship happily 'being'.  This has of course come about because Faith's 'neuter-em' chip has finally kicked in one month after implant and we think it was the shock of Lillibet being poorly that made her initially stop and she never restarted her yawp fest and of course, Lillibit is missing her lady bits completely, so not a sound out of her! It bliss!

This gives us all the chance to stealth food watch and Lillibet has become my ally.  She is mad on vegetable peelings and it's easy for her to get away with blue murder because she doesn't steal.  This gives me an idea!

If I dress lillibet as a string bean, in a little pea green suit, complete with zipper from head to toe, I could hide her in the vegetable rack where she can spy at the goings on at 'chopping level'. Then she can signal with her eyes in various formats of blinking to tell me what is where and if there is an opening for me to whip in and steal something tasty!

Now...just to get her into this bean suit.  Oh Lillibet, come here and be a love. No, no honey, don't stick your feet out. Outch! Don't bite. Eeek, no Lillibet, fold, bend love. That's it.... zip.  OMC...what am I doing in this bean suit?  YAWP YAWP YAWP

KS =^..^=

Well, it's all very well cat sitting a peeky family member, but it really does knock the stuffing out of you.  I am bush wacked and just can't seem to get enough shut eye.  The senses are set to high alert and even though Lillibet is recovering well now, it's still a huge amount of ware and tare on the mind, body and spirit.

Take Faith as a fine example, she knows that her daughter is poorly and she spends all her time watching her. At first she was angry at Lillibet and reprimanded her to make her get up and when Lillibet first had her operation, she did get up when Faith told her to. But as she became poorly again, Faith became more motherly and washed her alot. Faith chose not to eat during this time, so Momma has been feeding them together to make a little competition between them and they have had so many vitamin licks with extra vitamin B to make them hungry. It's working, but of course, I am stressing too and my way of showing it is to YAWP and POOP! I can't seem to get enough food and the four meals a day is no match for the 9 or 10 that Lillibet and Faith are getting AND they are both getting newborn kitten biscuits because they are higher in protein and have probiotics in them.  I understand that they need all of that, but I could do with a bit of pampering too!

Faith and I are ushered into the kitchen at night, this means that Faith can't graze on her Noms because, I would eat them for her! We have been issued with a heated bed each whilst lady muck gets to sleep between the Parentals on a heated blankie and spoon fed at regular intervals... Not that I wish to be sick, but I wouldn't mind a bit of that TLC either!

KS =^..^=  

TIMES OF CHANGE:-
Well, considering this 'Neuter-em' chip is meant to make the CatWomen quiet, it has done nothing, so far, for Faith! Lillibet on the other paw, after 5 days has become OUR Lillibet again and is back in the land of the living.  Momma had drugged both of them after night one of the 'neuter-em' chip because of the yawping that went on ALL NIGHT and then they just seemed to get louder and louder and LOUDER each day!

Faith is still loud, she likes the sound of her own voice and stands with her head in the litter tray just bellowing! Now that Lillibet is 'off call', we can now play together and yesterday, for a few minutes, she and I gamboled through the lounge chasing a rolled up crisp packet! I was even a bit silly and climbed the cat post and hung upside down.  I haven't done that in so long I got a bit of a head rush and had to lay down and just watch from the side lines!

Also changing today is the smell of the roast.  Momma has prepared a turkey breast with streaky bacon and the two smells are just heavenly.  I keep visiting the oven front and letting out a YAWP as I know that in a few hours of gentle steam baking at 160 degrees, that turkey will be just right and because it's turkey WE ALL GET SOME! 

Now, the only thing left for a peaceful Sunday is to find the OFF switch for Faith.  She had us up at 2.30 am with her screaming, it's little wonder she can keep going all day and night without stopping.  This 'Neuter-um' chip really is going by the book with her.  I think ear plugs are in order as the octaves have risen and the screaming increased to such levels we had better tape the window and hide the glasses.

KS =^..^=   

WHO HAS HOGGED ALL THE NOMS?:-
Well I never, a baby Hedgehog has come to our garden and we are all so excited, we haven't seen Hogs for ages and wondered if their decline was a lack of food?  But it appears not to be so, as only last week Momma found a big Hog in the Hebe, routing about for worms.

But todays Hog is a baby Hog and he was so cute.  Lillibet saw him first and came and told me all about this strange prickly thing that was routing about our gravel outside the CatPod.  Momma thought he looked a bit peckish and really he shouldn't be awake during the day, so she made him supper of OUR CAT MEAT!!! He happily munched on a packet of our best food and race off for a nap in the bushes ready for his night time adventures, more befitting of a Hog!  

Of course, I complained that the baby Hog was getting OUR NOMS and spent the next 10mins YAWPING at the top of my lungs to make sure everyone knew how hard done by I was at not having my own Noms on a tiny plate!  I made low Yawping noises that made me sound like a stud cat in full call.  I made the roof of the CatPod vibrate with the severity of it and the darn right cheek of Momma feeding baby Hogs IN FRONT OF ME!  Not only this happened, but the Parentals had beef for Sunday lunch and I didn't get a taste of that either!  A phone call to cat line is in order here, soon there will be hundreds of Hogs roaming our garden, all lined up waiting for our NOMS!

I heard that in North Uist and other Outer Hebridean 
islands that Hedgehogs are a threat  wading bird populations as they eat their eggs and they were once eradicated from the Islands but are making a return again.... well, perhaps this is what is happening here, they will come and take over our NOMS!
I wonder, is this why the Scots have a 'Hogmanay' Festival? A festival for Many Hogs?

KS =^..^=

NAME CALLING:-
Yet again, my lack of fur has deemed me to be pigeon holed into the 'Sphynx' category.  Honestly, I am one hundred percent, genuine Devon Rex although, I am easily mistaken for my naked cousins and so what, we are quite similar and it's nice to be different and I never take offence!

Only today, Momma heard something that made her Meow Out Loud, that a certain cat named Oberon, should have been stamped at birth with a government health warning! The very same could be said of me.  We could be blood brothers, cattitude fellows, mischief makers and shakers.  This Oberon sounds like my kind of catmate.  His owner said that there should be 
paper work enforcing an age restriction for the humans... We are seriously high maintenance us cleaver clogs cats, hard work and good fun in equal measures. 

Momma has tittered about the event all day and it really has struck a cord in me too.  Note to self, I really must try harder to gain superior status amongst my Feline counterparts as I, really, am the only cat with a Health Warning!  There can't be anyone else out there as meticulous at food theft and plate licking as me? There really can't be any other Feline with my aloof attitude and outragious behaviours... can there, CAN THERE?

Oh, and I have to state, that on Sunday, I stole me a piece of that delicious Turkey, it was sitting idle on Momma's plate.  Lilibet informed me of it's whereabouts and I raced in, full tilt, onto the sofa and off the sofa with said Turkey in 'Gobblely Gob' and raced upstairs, where Momma Sloth chased a growling me and made me drop my prize, like some Spaniel on a pheasant shoot.  I did as I was told and was rewarded with half of my catch because Momma was laughing so hard she was crying and I mewed like a sad kitten at the loss of my Turkey prize.... Sucker, gets her every time!

KS =^..^=

GOBBLE GOBBLE:-
I woke up this morning and thought it was Xmas!  Really, I did.  It was the smell you see, the smell of Turkey.....

Oh well, that's it, I am awake, I am down in the kitchen with my face pressed up against the front of the oven, the light has since gone out and now I have to peer harder into it's dark depths and catch me a shimmer of silver foil and the look of the hump on the shelf.  That, my dear friends is all I can hope for in this here oven.  This is my life, everything I live for, the whole reason for my existence!  I will now perform a ritual dance to get me a piece of that sweet turkey in my dishy.

Firstly, I will prance and dance and YAWP like never before.  I will cavort with Momma and kiss her at every opportunity, even if it means launching my self at her from a distance, this usually gets the attention I am after, then I will jump down and flit about her feet, nearly knocking her over as we trip and cavort together and I draw her ever closer to the oven to make my intentions clear.

I will race at eye level, but occasionally, I slip and end up balanced on one paw looking dignified as though it was part of my routine.  I will sit on top of the cat post and check out the oven from afar, you see, both the heat and the smell linger up there and I have the vantage point to see and sniff in equal amounts, it is also a good launch pad for an unsuspecting ManSlave as he puts the rubbish out! Sucker - get that dude every time! 

I will endeavour to YAWP so loudly that I drown out the Sunday 'cleaning music' and eventually either I get the Sunday p around my arse (which I quite like) or the music gets turned off!  Either way, neither of them puts me off my stride. I am here on this planet for a reason and my reason is Sunday Lunch in my favourite flavour TURKEY!

KS =^..^=

FADING AWAY:-
I just can't believe that the Parentals are out all day, we are devoid of Noms and by midday we are veritably passed out with hunger.  We are shrinking before our own eyes and there is nothing we can do about it!

It's OK for the women folk here, they get to sleep in the kitchen over night and have free feed Noms, heated beds and en-suite facilities.  Where as I am locked away in the confines of the office with nothing but a water bowl and a fluffy blankie.  Whilst they are growing fatter, I am shrinking! It's very hard when your stomach is used to being fed 4 meals a day to have meals slashed from your diet with out word or warning.  Why are they not coming home at the allotted time to feed us? It's not like they are busy or anything.  We are much more important than these tenants they ramble on about.  In fact, I think if we go back a year, we might even be reading a very similar story somewhere. Time to make a phone call!

I rang Cat Line today and complained that we are waif like and again the nice lady on the phone said that 3 meals a day was totally adequate and that we have access to the outdoors, various water dishes and litter trays, what more did I want?  Well, I thought her rather rood, what I want is food on tap, no more measuring and weighing of Noms, free roam of the entire garden, not just 12ft of it and someone home all day to cuddle me when I feel worried. I just couldn't make her understand that we are all receiving substandard treatment in the wants and needs department. She thought I was being a bit OTT.  Seriously, me, OTT - yeah right!

KS =^..^=

MEASURED OUT


It occurs to me that I have been cheated out of food.  Really, it just pinged into my head last night when I was given a weighed out portion of 20g of food.  You know, I never questioned it before, but since metric has been introduced into the UK I am missing out on Noms as I am sure that the 20g was actually 20oz.  Seriously, I don't josh when food is concerned, but I think the rations have shrunk considerably.
So I really should be receiving 566.99g of kibble and my pitiful 85g of steamed chicken should actually be 2409.71g  and with both of these I get them three times a day in small meals, so you can triple that amount!  That's why I am perpetually hungry and half starved, not to mention fading away!

ManSlave was telling be about UKIP and maybe they have the answer for me so that I could get my metric Momma sorted.  But I don't really get that having a 'long sleep' is really going to help my cause, as all that will happen is I wake up and the same old 20g of this and 85g of that is proffered during the day or in the auto feeder for me to snack on.  No one can live on snax, especially me.  I am on the go 24/7 and this morning was no exception!

I woke up early and made a substantial amount of noise, I am in the office as the Parentals need some sleep and I can't share faith and Lillibets food and I beat up Mr.Zeus... anyway, I digress.  I was awake and my tummy was rumbling.  I figured that a 6am start for the house was needed, the real reason was I had made space in my tummy by filling up my tray and that makes me starving right away... so I began to YAWP and YAWP for brekki. My Auto Feeder would not be willed open, no matter how I stare at it and I could smell the 7am snax, but I was hungry NOW!  One very tired Momma came and told me to get back to bed, but she nearly gagged on my gasses, so I got to go back to bed with her - bonus! Continual purring for an hour until the machine opened and then another hour and then another hour of purring until 8am until real brekki at 8am - well, I say real in jest now, under the circumstances of Metric!

=^..^=

ELVES HAVE ARRIVED AT MAYSTAR

I am not sure exactly what has been going on in the last week, but Momma & ManSlave vanished to a very cold place called Poland and brought back a small blue kitten in a blue elf suit with a little 'Orb' stitched into his hat!  He is apparently a BlueSun Polski boy. I have had a small sniff and now he has been ushered into the kitten room for a few weeks quarantine apparently, so that means my Noms will be safe from a new someone pinching my share of fish buttons!  Lillibet & Faith want to Mother him already and have tried to break into the kitten room with Faith hanging on the door handle and Lillibet pushing the half door, which she doesn't know is locked!!! 

We keep hearing that his name is Otello, it's an unusual name and comes from the Opera not a miss-spelled Shakespeare play. Of course, you are always given birth names but sometimes you get called something else instead.  Remember I was born 'Trouble' and Momma changed it to Slinky and King to boot.  So you never know, this little blue elf may end up with a few pet names along the way!

I can now see another ton of kitten food being hauled into the kitten room, I have YAWPED and YAWPED trying to get in, but as per usual, the Noms just vanishes and nothing is coming out but little sacks of litter... here we go again. Kittens get everything!  What is going on in my world? YAWP.

KS =^..^=

ALL TOO QUIET

There is definitely something afoot, or should I say a-pawed? The house is quiet, the Parentals are busy, things are happening in the 'Kitten Room'. For example, it's had a wash and brush up and spruced around the edges... yes, something is strangely going on.  Of course, I am the only one to notice that bags were packed days ago and there is an air of business about the place and Uncle Paul has been around for a visit.  In my mind that dictates a night or so away for the Parentals, but what's with the cleaning?

Well, I can't worry about it, I am sure things will be revealed in due course and I have better fish to fry than wonder what the heck is going on!  For example, I have noticed of late that I am only getting a set amount of Noms, it seems to be measured out exactly now.  I am not sure why, but I have an inkling it's to do with starving me until I submit and purr more... I will give it a try, it isn't hard to perform a rumble on request for anyone holding the door to my food domain open.  That Lillibet is getting in on my kibble action though and this is becoming stressful, she has a whole bowl of her kibble that she eats all day and is let in and out of her little box AND she has access to a secret supply in the kitten room where only her and Faith can squeeze through the tiny door into a secret food store.... then, THEN they have the audacity to sprinkle MY noms on the floor at night for us to share.  It's not on you know, I am running low already and only have 5k left.  If I have to share my fish buttons with her, I may get through that much quicker than expected and Momma may not notice and forget to re-order. ::Paw on forehead:: Woe is me.  YAWP!

Occasionally, this week, the noms at lunch has been late or non existent, I don't know what's up with these Parentals, they are slacking.  I can't see why they can't employ Uncle Paul to feed us at lunchtime if they can't be bothered to turn up.  I really miss my snack and by the time anyone decides to come home and feed us, I am nearly expired with worry that I may starve.  A cat can't survive on just 2 meals a day you know! Get your acts together, or we will raid your fridge!

KS =^..^=

SOMETHING SMELLS GOOD

It has to be said that this week my Licker has gotten me into terrible trouble.  The Parentals have left out morsels of edible and non edible things for me to try out my taste buds on.  

On Monday I had me some grated carrot.  Lillibet was so entertained by the carrot strips that Momma gave her a few to play with and I was there to catch them, mouth open, as she tossed them into the air or patted them along the floor.  They were refreshing and I can now see a little better too!  

On Tuesday I begged and begged at ManSlaves plate for a taste of his Chicken Piri Piri.  I wished I hadn't now, because he dipped his finger in the homemade sauce and WOWZERS it was hot! Note to self.... do NOT lick your bum!

On Wednesday I found an escaped ice cube that had rattled out of the freezer compartment, it was a great game following it around the floor and making wet trails all over the kitchen.  It finally lay exasperated in a heap and melted away, where upon a few moments later ManSlave enters stage left and steps in it and it seeps through his sock! He said something unmentionable!

Thursday came and went with not many things to set my Licker upon, it felt redundant and useless so I put it to work cleaning 'bits' of this and that from the carpet that the vacuum had missed. Mmmm, I found a shriveled up piece of carrot from Monday under the washing machine too, bonus! I even did a tour of the fish tank lids and licked off all the fish food that had melted onto the glass near the feed hole, they were all spotless when I was done. Momma should be pleased I thought, but she wasn't impressed, I don't get it?

Friday was a busy day, ManSlave had been in the attic and there were copious amounts of fluff and tundra that fell from the big black hole and Faith was determined that she could climb the ladder and escape to freedom, she changed her mind and stood at the top screaming for Momma to come and get her, it was dark up there and ManSlave only had a torch enough for one. I had to use my licker to wash her all over because she was scared and it settled her nerves.  She always tastes sweet and soft. Bubba Lish Baby Delicious.

On Saturday, Momma purchased some avocado soap for her face, it's full of vitamin E and apparently good for you.  First I licked it and then I bit down really hard because it smelled so good and as you know, us Felines eat by smell. My mouth started to foam and the suds mounted up - I opened my mouth to Yawp but a big bubble came out instead and drifted away, it drifted to ManSlave who thought... 'Ohhh bubbles' and popped it. Trapped inside was my YAWP and it nearly deafened him! I was caught then, 'red pawed', mouth full of green soap and looking very sorry for my self.

Today is Sunday, I know this as late last night a little piece of Welsh Lamb was anointed in garlic, acasia honey and salt and put in the fridge to 'meld'.  Today will be it's cooking day, the oven has gone onto a cool oven and it will be slow cooked for a few hours and tease my taste buds.  My Licker is feeling better after yesterdays avocado soap fest and I am limbering up for a taste of that special smell any time soon. The light is on, I am on full alert and will notify the Parentals when I think it's ready for testing. Wish me luck.

KS =^..^=

A FAIR JUDGE OF CHARACTER

It has to be said that Momma tries really hard to be be a good person and she works hard at her various jobs 'Chief Litter Remover & Feeder'. She always tries hard to please every one and make sure that we are all fed correctly with just the right food to match our tummies, skin and ages. She is a model Parental and an Angel in disguise... But this time she has really messed up!

You see, she is wondering about the 'food' thing and why all of a sudden Faith is scratching and Mr.Zeus is lumpy and what with my tummy troubles (we shan't go into those!!) and sadly, the death of TomFun, it sort of all boils down to one thing - FOOD! Well not just the food, but the lack of fatty acids in it.  So we are all in for a huge change and that means a huge wait as the food that will be be on trial is from Germany no less.  The samples should arrive next week and then we can all get down and test it out.  The only problem is... she has SOLD OUR NOMS!  We have just enough for a week, the cupboards are low, she has let them run dry and I can see the bottom of my biscuit barrel.  However, I have noticed that a large quantity of steamed chicken has arrived, so I am OK Jack! It's just the others, what will they eat whilst I roll about in my chicken heaven?

I feel that selling all our unopened Noms is a bit rash don't you?  What if there is a delay in our new food and what if the new food doesn't suit our tummies and what if we don't like it (yeah right) and what if we don't like the colour of the packaging and what if we can't read the instructions because they are all in German and what if Mr.Zeus throws it up because his tummy is delicate and what if Lillibet decides that she doesn't like fish and what if Faith just walks off in a huff? (she does that a lot) Well I am under no illusions that they will all starve and I will feast like the King that I am! 

Until our new Noms arrive then... and if they don't, my paw is hovering over the speed dial for CatLine!

KS =^..^=

NOT AN OUNCE OF DIFFERENCE

Ok, so you humans feel that you have to go on these strange faddy diets after the binge of Christmas, well as you can see, I for one will not be entertaining any dieting to my health regime! I am both svelt and handsome in equal amounts and this is due of course to my stunning physique. Who needs to diet when I have Momma making sure that bowl has just the right amount of kibble in it to keep this figure in tip top condition.  No matter how I YAWP and create, I never seem to get fed any more!  I am sure that I could squeeze another can of steamed chicken into my temple of a body!  Allegedly, I get fed enough for two cats - well that's what the packets say! 2x85g steamed chicken tins and 90g of biscuit are enough to sustain two average cats - since when have I been average?  I have a metabolism rate of a Short Tailed Shrew, which passes out if it goes 10 minutes without eating!  I can devour enough for 5 cats and see no ill effects at all, well except in the litter tray and that's where my New Years resolutions rears it's head - never step back in the dirt box!  Happy New Ears to you and yours.

KS =^..^=

DISH OF THE DAY

Since the MiniCats have been let out to rampage my mornings have never been the same.  I am assured that in a few weeks it will all stop and life will return to normality... whatever that is?  I just don't have the time for my usual morning duties anymore, but I do like to reminisce on a purrfect day. I guess now, I do get to watch kitten food in the 'Food Hall' where I can ponder the 101 ways to lure it out from it's jail - It all ads to the tapestry of my busy schedule!

I like to have my breakfast made for me and even though I absolutely HATE to sit for it, I do it because Momma loves me even more!  Then I like to wait for Mr.Zeus to finish his breakfast and I watch him with my eyes half shut as if I am dozing, just in-case I am in for a morsel that has gone unnoticed! I then like to do my morning rituals of Orb Worship - whether it shows its self or not, I am a sucker to the cause and always hold out for Orb Rays through the Orb Cover. After that I would normally seek out a warm spot for some deep meditation but not this weekend, nope, this weekend has been disrupted.

It now all starts with 'them' being fed first.  I can hear the chinking of china and the munching of kibble remotely.  I can hear TomFun plaintive cries emanating from the bathroom as he has finished his meaty and wants to give meaty kisses to everyone.  I can hear litter trays being scooped out and I can hear - finally - footsteps on the stairs heading in my direction.  I wait patiently with tiny YAWPS, behind the door and every morning it catches my toes and every morning I dance around holding up my right paw.  I then jump to the worktop and race along it's length to get me some head-rub action and kisses and then I race to the food door and kiss the handle and YAWP in my loudest YAWP. Then I race again to the shelf where my bowl is kept, all the time receiving kisses on my forehead and I head-butt Momma to wake her up more.  She switches on the kettle whilst I run frantically from food dish to food packet that is now laying face down on the side.  Momma wanders to the fridge, takes out my 'Slinky Meds' and I watch, drooling, whilst she wraps it in a tiny piece of ham and proffers it to me and it's gone, down the slippery slide, untasted down my gullet.  YAWP I say which I feel constitutes to "more."  I dance between her slippered feet and get the odd shove and she snuffles back to my dish and finally, oh finally, she tares the tape from the chicken pouch and I watch as it slips into my dish and is waiting for me to devour it.  It quivers when Momma stirs it and I smell the delicate flavour and hear it's silky juice squelching. This is when the kibble gets added to a little bowl and placed inside my dish to make me eat slowly as I can down this breakfast in 28.6 seconds with out it!

I then dance and spin in a ritual that goes back to the first time I was fed, I am turning pink with excitement and spinning faster and faster until we reach my eating place.  I do a turn on command and then I sit when I am asked - this is allegedly to make me calm and not accidentally bite the feeder - yeah right! I dash forward in anticipation and get me a quick lick before the dish is finally lowered. Agghhh yes, food.  Lovely yummy food.  Now I can really start my day - Bring it all, MiniCats and all!

KS =^..^=

A NEW GENERATION IS BORN

The thing about babies is they seem to copy everything their Parents do.  This new litter of kittens are no exception, they are copying everything Faith is doing and the traits of her life are rubbing off and influencing these mini cats.  Take young Jaz for example, she looks, act and could be Faith in miniature.

When Faith was little she used to frequent the shower and steal the drain cover and take it out using her paws and then play like a crazy thing.  She would always sit and watch the water flow down the plug hole or even sit and wait for you to pull the sink plug out and wait for the water to fill the shower tray.  It's an infatuation that actually started with Mr. Zeus who is Faith's half Brother, he taught Faith to 'water watch', but never had he stolen the drain cover! 

Well just a few years on and Jaz is applying the same learning to the drain cover at only 11weeks old!  Already she has watched Mum flick her paw in a certain way and remove the cover and then stick her paw deep into the shower trap and remove the internal hair trap, after this she dangles into the water and comes out with a very wet paw and you know they have been in the shower as it looks like we have a number of one legged cats walking around leaving paw prints all over the bath mat!

It's been a strange Sunday, normally the early roast would have made the oven, but today the Parentals decided that this morning they were busy, so lunch became dinner and my tummy turned upside down when they started with hot peppers stuffed with feta cheese and then summer Rhonda lamb.  Now for a change, because I had been exceptionally good, I had me some succulent tasty non fat lamb in my little dish at tea time - everyone else had fish! Ha, suckers! 

KS =^..^=