It's been a funny sort of day. The Orb is out and it is so warm and we were allowed out, one at a time on our harnesses. But the Orb keep hiding behind fluffy clouds and it goes quite chilly. Enough to give you chicken skin.  Talking of chicken skin, we have, cooking in a nice clean oven, the thigh of some free range turkey. Only the other day he was legging it about the place and now he is roasting up very nicely in our oven. How lucky am I to peer in and see it's little skin crisping up?  For those vegetarians amongst you, the potatoes look good too! With Momma's dodgy allergies, meat and two veg is about all she can eat, so being a veggie for many years, the Parentals had to turn back to eating meat - so long as it is free range and had a good life!  I will give it a good after life, if I am allowed to have a lick?  I am sure I will, we nearly always get a little something on a Sunday - even if that means that Monday produces a quicker chocolate gold!

Even though the Orb is out, the Parentals are inside shouting Button, Hamilton? Goodness knows what they find interesting about over engineered boxes of carbon flying around a race track?  Later Momma was glued to the TV with Lillibet under one arm and Faith under the other arm drooling at the tele because there are some sexy looking horses prancing about looking flash.  To me, dressage is like watching cement dry and that can be made much more interesting, I can tell you when a fly lands in it!  Prancing horses. ::shakes head::  To get her attention I do a canter half pass across the lounge, she takes no notice so I piaffe along the back of the sofa YAWPING and do a tempy two time change onto the table and extended trot right up to her nose and halt squarely.  NOW SHE SEES ME!

KS =^..^=

Sometimes you just need to do NOTHING!  This is unusual in our house as there is always something going on, but it depends if you get involved in the goings on or not.

Sunday lunch is worth getting involved in, where as vacuuming is a dull sport to watch. However, Sunday is a bed change day, but today, Faith really didn't want to move and even thought the bedding usually gets done first thing in the morning Momma just couldn't disturb her. So she got back on the bed with Faith and finished a painting, whilst Faith slept soundly next to Momma and purred every time Momma touched her.

There was a Sunday lunch today, but both of the Parentals were not that hungry. I was, of course, very hungry and YAWPED and YAWPED the whole time it was cooking.  It was a little tiny piece of piggie and really just only enough for me. It's expensive that freerange stuff, I really think they ought to get the cheaper cuts and we could all indulge. But Momma won't have anything unless it's run free and had a god start in life.  What about MY start in life?

The bedding has now been changed and Faith was dragged around the bed on the bottom sheet, she was hanging on for dear life, digging her claws in and swinging hither and thither getting a free ride. Then when the new sheets went down, she raced about and under the sheet making a little moving hump.  OK, I couldn't help myself, I saw her, I haven't moved for most of the day, but this was too good an opportunity to miss. I pounced on her and made her cry out. She is such a baby at times! That was my exercise for the day.  Well the only thing I had exercised was my voice box - now that I had exercised an awful lot.

KS =^..^=  

It has been FOREVER since the parentals have made a Sunday Roast.  They have been busy every weekend and a roast is the last thing on their minds, but today, our olfactory organs were exposed to the smell of crackling!  It is one of my favourite smells and even those of you who are vegetarians can still find it difficult to resist the smell of pork crackling and bacon. But it's OK, this little piggy was a home reared orchard snuffler and he or she had a very good start in life and so we don't feel so bad as to taste his delicateness.

I sat for a whole two hours in front of the oven, it still doesn't have a light in it, so I have to sit with my face pressed up to the glass which is nice and warm and makes you drowsy.  Lillibet was no help, he kept peering in and thwakking me on the head to make me move, but this is my Sunday occupation and not hers so I muscled my way back in.

When it was finally served, Lillibet took pride of place on Momma's plate, she knows better than to sit on ManSlaves plate.  She was waiting for her share.  Plates re-washed and Lillibet placed back on the floor, we try again for our morsels.  They did arrive and in super time.  I had mine in my dishy and the CatWomen got to eat on the kitchen table, only because I am such a ganet I snaffle anything going. That kitchen table has become a cat table I think. The Parentals never use it unless visitors come and then it gets such a scrubbing!

Once I had sniffed my food in my tummy it was time to just sit and contemplate how to steal some from their plates, but with all three of us sniffing about, the lounge door was shut and we has no option but to go and lick the plug hole in the sink to get the last remnants of juices. I am not sure it's good for your health to lick out the sink, I often think of all the germs, then I think of the favour I am doing the Parentals by making it clean!

KS =^..^=

Firstly, I would like to wish all my followers a very Happy Easter Sunday and that means ROAST something.  Today was a chook of non heritage, a white meat breeder instead of our usual black leg, but non the less a free range one.  Of course, I Yawped and Yawped until Momma gave in and trimmed fresh juicy bits off for all three of us and fed us all together in a little trio. 

I felt good today on my new meds and thought I could steal a little bit from Lillibet, but she was having none of that and promptly Thwakked me on my head and told me to back off. Faith wondered what all the fuss was about and looked up from her chicken, that's when my paw came out and swiped a piece right from under her sniffer.  Momma poked me in my belly and I did a little hiss at her.  That ensued in a mad chase around the house with me in the lead and then I fell on the bed upstairs and showed my vulnerable undersides for copious amounts of kissing.  When I was suitably recharge with kisses, I raced about the house Yawping and rounding up the CatWomen and making them chase me, the I turned and Thwakked them, Yawped and ran away... as usual, they follow me to the ends of the earth.

I can honestly say that after feeling as sick as a cat on Monday and had me a quickie visit with Simon and he used the FURMOMETER, I decide that I had better feel 100% better or THAT was going to be a regular occurrence!  I was too shocked even to complain that he had done that when Momma said he wouldn't - but sick is sick and FURMOMETERS are needed in such cases.  However, it was concluded that it is a transient side effect of the Atopica medication and I am to revisit in a few weeks to see about reducing the dose and my sickness.

I do feel more like my old self. The naughty, boisterous one! The one who gets into all sorts of trouble and Thwakking competitions and chasing and yawping as well as long purr fests and snuggles with Momma.  I have even been sitting on ManSlave and showing him some love - he is so taken aback that he thinks it's because I love him. He is useful and Momma has been away a few days with Grand Mew Mew and I needed a lap to sit on!

KS =^..^=   

There is always something worth waiting for and that is Sunday Lunch. The Parentals decided that a tasty piece of happy cow was on the menu and in choosing this little piece of heaven, they decided that we should all be able to have a treat too.  The CatWomen got fresh uncooked beef and I got the bone to lick. Really, I did. Well, I had already been up to no good with my licker the week before and I may as well have something a little extra to make me feel happy.
It is unheard of of course and usually I Yawp and Yawp to no avail, but this week, I knew that bone was mine.  I sat and watched Momma clean it off and polish it a little and then give it to me for a good licking.  Lillibet was scared of it as it click clacked on the floor, but I know better than to chase it around the laminate and took my prize to the central rug for a good chew.  Well, I say chew. I couldn't get my chops around it properly and Momma kept saying 'lick Slinky'.  I did as I was told and just licked and licked.

Lillibet got a little brave and snuck up behind me. I was a good boy and didn't Thwak her. She backed off anyway because it's a boys thing to have bones. Bones are not for girls. I am the hero of the day. I am the champion. I feel good, I am a happy boy. I am the King!

KS =^..^= 

It's been awhile since the smell of cooking has awakened my senses.  It's been all left overs and 'eating from the freezer' since Xmas. I think the Parentals over indulged over the festive season and they were fed up with the whole 'roasted anything'!

But, it seems we are in for a treat today, I spotted a happy chicken laying on the floor of the fridge, he is a Leicester Black Leg, quite the bird. He is bald, just like me and with, funnily enough, black legs... just like me!  Heck... I had better get a jiggle on, I don't want to be mistaken for the roast!

I shall keep an eye on the bird, he is soon to be trussed up and thrown into the depths of the oven and the light is now not working at all in there it's hard to see through the glass, so watching it bubble and brown from the safe distance of the cat post is not an option, this is going to take stealth and wit to get me anywhere near that chook.  If Lillibet didn't feel so groggy after her vaccinations I could have enlisted her help.  Faith, of course is up for most things these days and she has the 'cute factor' and can distract the Parentals bu arching her back and walking on tippy toes around the 'other end of the kitchen', squeaking as she goes to draw their undivided attentions as I make my way to the oven to peer deep into it's belly and check out my chooks progress.

I am a patient cat, I don't have to YAWP as loudly as I have in the past, I have learned (for now) that silence gets you so much more in rewards than screaming at the oven door and tripping up the parentals. It gets you a smidgen of pure white chicken to savour.  I am indeed part of the Stealth Food Team and Faith is my ally. She is turning into a food connoisseur, proved irrevocably by Simon the Vet, who said she was looking a little 'tubby'! It's all this food tasting I tell you! Faith, of course, hasn't spoken to anyone since she was deemed 'rotund' and hasn't noticed the removal of such delicacies from her diet!

KS =^..^=    

I have been a good boy, I have been baby sitting.  We have had friends staying this weekend because Momma was Judging at the Supreme Cat Show yesterday and her lovely Stewards came over for tea and stayed the night.  Nichola Brown from Rascalirex stayed over and she has a bun in the oven, I honestly got quite excited when I heard about this this because I figured anything in any oven was worth taking note of!  But, alas, I found out it meant that she had a human bubbah on board.  I remember when Faith was pregnant, she used to lay on her back with her legs akimbo and I was somewhat relieved that this lady didn't take the same stance on our lounge carpet, but was ushered onto Momma's space with the heated blankie turned to hot and bubbah was shrouded in the bear rug.  Well, I figured it was rude not to look after them seeing as they were guests and made my self comfy around her tummy.  It was a lovely feeling and very calming to lay next to such a precious gift.

Once the visitors had left for the day I turned my concentration to other oven contents, a lovely Black Legged Leicester chook. I made sure that ManSlave was looking after said chook, by pestering him every five minutes telling him that it might be burning, this would make him open the oven door and let out the lovely smell.  My wait was rewarded today with pure white moist meat... mmmm. EVen Lillibet & Faith took notice today and neither of them usually like chook, but today, they both ate a small bowl full. Well, a little snooze on the sofa with the CatWomen and Momma on the heated blankie and it made a perfect Sunday.

Oooh Oooh... Momma was quoted in the Daily Mirror from the Supreme Cat Show have a little read here
KS =^..^=

There is a lot to be said about balance in a home.  It has taken a number of months to get to where we are today, but it has finally come about and we are all being snuggly Devons.  Before Faith's 'neuter-em' chip and Lillibets 'ladybits' being removed, it was a different story of head sitting, jealousy and tension.  Now, it's like a switch has been flicked and we are finally all at ease.  We had the first bonding session when Mr.Zeus left home to live in Milton Keynes, we gained new camaraderie and affection for each other. Then when Lillibet became poorly, we all rallied around to make her better and Faith has taken on roll of doting Mother ever since. 

Just yesterday, ManSLave was playing with Lillibet with her 'chain-straw' and they were having a ball.  Faith, who is quite a spoiled little lady, wanted Lillibet to play with her, so she ran into the lounge, squeaking and creating, raced to the twigs in the glass vase and promptly began to flick them against the wall, making an enticing sound. Lillibet was so into playing with ManSlave that she ignored the first 'call to action'.  Faith then upped the tempo of squeaking and broke off one of the twigs. Running around the house calling Lillibet and carrying the twig.  That was it, the sound of twig tapping the wood flooring and the walls on the stairs, Lillibet had no option but to leave ManSlave and follow her Mother. ManSlaves face was a study. He was gutted to the core, to be left for a twig!

I have found myself, that I am a bit more playful and have enjoyed the odd moments of glee. We all then, have a mad five minutes with me in the lead, racing hither and thither, creating mini train of squeaking, racing cats.  I then find my self in the hallway, YAWPING at the top of my voice and them exhaustion over takes me and I have to lay down, where I am now followed, not to have my head sat on, but to be washed and kissed.  This is the life!  They are still my CatWomen, but I feel more in control of the love.  I could get used to this!

Well, no rest for the wicked, the roast is calling me. I must resume normal duties of tripping up the parentals and making sure they don't burn the crackling on our little piece of freerange piggy.  I shall have to press my sniffer closer to the oven door to check into it's depths, then beg for a tasting. Lillibet will help with the vegetables and Faith only likes ham. More for me then!

KS =^..^=

The smell of Sunday Roast has penetrated our nostrils, normally it's just mine, but the CatWomen are attentive to smells too, now that their senses have moved from pheromones to normal aromas. It's nice not having them sitting on my head and yelling all and sundry at passing tom cats from the window.  The place is quite quiet and we are all in companionship happily 'being'.  This has of course come about because Faith's 'neuter-em' chip has finally kicked in one month after implant and we think it was the shock of Lillibet being poorly that made her initially stop and she never restarted her yawp fest and of course, Lillibit is missing her lady bits completely, so not a sound out of her! It bliss!

This gives us all the chance to stealth food watch and Lillibet has become my ally.  She is mad on vegetable peelings and it's easy for her to get away with blue murder because she doesn't steal.  This gives me an idea!

If I dress lillibet as a string bean, in a little pea green suit, complete with zipper from head to toe, I could hide her in the vegetable rack where she can spy at the goings on at 'chopping level'. Then she can signal with her eyes in various formats of blinking to tell me what is where and if there is an opening for me to whip in and steal something tasty!

Now...just to get her into this bean suit.  Oh Lillibet, come here and be a love. No, no honey, don't stick your feet out. Outch! Don't bite. Eeek, no Lillibet, fold, bend love. That's it.... zip.  OMC...what am I doing in this bean suit?  YAWP YAWP YAWP

KS =^..^=

TIMES OF CHANGE:-
Well, considering this 'Neuter-em' chip is meant to make the CatWomen quiet, it has done nothing, so far, for Faith! Lillibet on the other paw, after 5 days has become OUR Lillibet again and is back in the land of the living.  Momma had drugged both of them after night one of the 'neuter-em' chip because of the yawping that went on ALL NIGHT and then they just seemed to get louder and louder and LOUDER each day!

Faith is still loud, she likes the sound of her own voice and stands with her head in the litter tray just bellowing! Now that Lillibet is 'off call', we can now play together and yesterday, for a few minutes, she and I gamboled through the lounge chasing a rolled up crisp packet! I was even a bit silly and climbed the cat post and hung upside down.  I haven't done that in so long I got a bit of a head rush and had to lay down and just watch from the side lines!

Also changing today is the smell of the roast.  Momma has prepared a turkey breast with streaky bacon and the two smells are just heavenly.  I keep visiting the oven front and letting out a YAWP as I know that in a few hours of gentle steam baking at 160 degrees, that turkey will be just right and because it's turkey WE ALL GET SOME! 

Now, the only thing left for a peaceful Sunday is to find the OFF switch for Faith.  She had us up at 2.30 am with her screaming, it's little wonder she can keep going all day and night without stopping.  This 'Neuter-um' chip really is going by the book with her.  I think ear plugs are in order as the octaves have risen and the screaming increased to such levels we had better tape the window and hide the glasses.

KS =^..^=   

SLAP AND TICKLE:-
Again, there is a lack of a Sunday Lunch and more of a Sunday express lunch - ManSlave rustled 8 slices of ready made beef from the supermarket, it was perfect, all red and delicious.  I however, didn't get any. YAWP.

But I did get a few licks of different things throughout the day.  One was the gravy jug of which I got a smarting slap on my arse with the Sunday paper and then I had me a lick of the potato water as it cooled.  Again, I got a smart slap on the arse. And later in the afternoon, whilst Momma took a nap, I did have me a lick of strawberry jam from her knife as she slept and just as my licker made for the other side of the knife, a hand came out of nowhere and slapped my butt! How did she wake up? I was uber quiet and stealthy.  I had to put my Licker into practice later on this evening too because ManSlave made some pakchoi in soy sauce and he didn't rinse the pan out properly, so I figured I had better get rid of the evidence for him so that he didn't get into trouble.... trouble, down came the tea towel on my backside.  

For some of you, you may think that getting my arse slapped so often would put me off using my Licker, but really it doesn't and I quite like it. I run to the stairs and chatter with my bum held in the air for a few more strokes with newpaper, towel or anything else I may get slapped with.  I back chat and roll about on my head, all the time keeping eye contact and making the Parentals laugh.  I know how to get them going and they are never mad for long.  Ok, so some could say that I am beaten and the Stockholm Effect is taking place and I love my captures'.  Well, I do love them and love me, even with my naughty misbehaving Licker, it's what makes me unique and purrfect and just the way they like me!

KS =^..^=

WOT NO ROAST:-
It is totally unbelievable that yet another Sunday where there is no Roast in the oven, as soon as the Orb makes it's appearance, then there is all sorts of strange food being concocted and today it was the choice of home made burgers. OK so it's still meat, but the cooking time is over and done with and I don't get a chance to wake from my morning slumber to the long lasting aromas of something bigger. Nope, they don't even make the oven, they are laid out unceremoniously on the griddle and flipped this way and that, put on a plate and devoured without a thought for my Feline digestive system needing it's fix.

Then to top it all off, they had salad... YAWP! How is a cat to enjoy his Sunday when lunch is over in a jiffy. By the time the condiments came out, I was dancing across the floor in anticipation of some burger and by the time they sat at the table I was whisked off it to make room for plates.  Well, of course, we are not meant to be on the table during dinner, but if you sit still and don't steal, you get to stay and you are occasionally mistaken for the pepper grinder, but that gets a bit much after the first time of having your head screwed off!

Well, I am with the relish; I relish the thought of eating their burgers, I relish the challenge of stealing their burgers by extending my neck like a turtle and I relish the fact that I could if I really wanted to... but I don't relish the slapped arse!

KS =^..^=  

GOBBLE GOBBLE:-
I woke up this morning and thought it was Xmas!  Really, I did.  It was the smell you see, the smell of Turkey.....

Oh well, that's it, I am awake, I am down in the kitchen with my face pressed up against the front of the oven, the light has since gone out and now I have to peer harder into it's dark depths and catch me a shimmer of silver foil and the look of the hump on the shelf.  That, my dear friends is all I can hope for in this here oven.  This is my life, everything I live for, the whole reason for my existence!  I will now perform a ritual dance to get me a piece of that sweet turkey in my dishy.

Firstly, I will prance and dance and YAWP like never before.  I will cavort with Momma and kiss her at every opportunity, even if it means launching my self at her from a distance, this usually gets the attention I am after, then I will jump down and flit about her feet, nearly knocking her over as we trip and cavort together and I draw her ever closer to the oven to make my intentions clear.

I will race at eye level, but occasionally, I slip and end up balanced on one paw looking dignified as though it was part of my routine.  I will sit on top of the cat post and check out the oven from afar, you see, both the heat and the smell linger up there and I have the vantage point to see and sniff in equal amounts, it is also a good launch pad for an unsuspecting ManSlave as he puts the rubbish out! Sucker - get that dude every time! 

I will endeavour to YAWP so loudly that I drown out the Sunday 'cleaning music' and eventually either I get the Sunday p around my arse (which I quite like) or the music gets turned off!  Either way, neither of them puts me off my stride. I am here on this planet for a reason and my reason is Sunday Lunch in my favourite flavour TURKEY!

KS =^..^=

A TRUCE MAYBE?
I don't really know what that word means.  I seriously try ignoring Mr.Flustery Knickers but he really is giving me grief and getting me into trouble.  Really, he is!  Well, OK, so maybe I do make things a little heated between us... maybe.

This fine Sunday morning is a fine example of bird watching and Orb Worshiping all together as a family unit.  It was nice, everyone chilling out, being happy and having fun doing the same thing... then Mr.Zeus sees me when I venture to the top shelf of the CatPod to check if he is still there (kowing full well he was still there).  It was then that Mr.Fluster Pants decides that if he screams at the top of his lungs as though someone is ripping his legs off, then ManSlave will come and rescue him and I get a slapped arse. But this morning, Momma got to me first and saw that I was poking him a little to get him to scream louder and when I had one poking him, he screamed like a girl so much that I lent over the shelf bed and THWAKKED him an almighty THWAK because he was being a big girls blouse and anyone that screams for nothing deserves a THWAK and a half.  I was sorry once I had made contact, because Momma saw me and I went down in her estimations as all around me billowed Mr.Zeus's fur, she looked very disappointed that I had defuzzed him.

Well, I can tell you Momma, that I too am disappointed that there has been NO ROAST DINNERS for two weeks.  I do all this ORB WORSHIP for you and your friends and I don't even get a smidgen of Roast sensation to fill my nostrils - Nope, Momma has taken to cooking Bengal & Punjab traditional curry and ManSlave said that although the food is very very tasty and cooling in all this weather... It is de-valuing the house as it smells like Garam Masala and the kitchen sides are yellow! Bring back the good old fashioned Roast dinner I say and let me savour it's tenderness and maybe then it will set me in a better mood for less Thwakking and more loving!

KS =^..^=

BOVINE BRAVERY
The Parentals have been waiting for months for a special phone call to say 'the meat is ready' You may have noticed that there has been nothing but piggy and very odd meals in the last month, well, that is at an end... Mr Butcher rang and said that the Charolais beef was indeed ready to be sold and they proudly carried home a few steaks and a forerib. As soon as I smelt it, I was drooling.  This was on Friday and I have had to live with the fact it has been in the fridge all that time, wrapped in brown paper (with my name on it!).  Today is going to be it's cooking day and I shall make myself available to be stepped on, head butted and pushed away.  It is my duty to be everywhere at once and make the Parentals job of cooking my forerib just the way I like it, very difficult.  I know the day will en-tone with 'Oh Slinky...' but I don't mind being stepped on a few times to get what I want! They say that Meteorology is the study of the atmosphere, well, I can tell you that the atmosphere here today is electric.  All of a sudden both Women are yelling, even though Faith had just stopped and Momma is recovering the cat posts which they can't stop rubbing them selves on, Faith and Lillibet - not Momma! There is racing and jumping and bonkers behaviour and I for one am not joining in, well apart from the odd prance out of their way.  Nope, it's not for me all this whizzing about, I might miss my meat moment.


So, because I like to Orb Worship and weather watch and meat watch - does that mean I am a Meteorologist or a Meat-eorologist? I shall take a nap and think about it.

KS =^.^=

SHARING THE BLAME

It was only Thursday that I mentioned on Facebook that I had failed in my duties as an Orb Worshiper and then I had a number of posts actually blaming me for the amount of damps, not just here in the UK, but all over the World!  "I Have broad shoulders" I said, "I can take it" and then promptly spent the following day Orb Worshiping like a crazy thing to make sure that at least some of the World had sun.  I think I Worshiped a little too hard as the temperature in Ylitornio, Lapland yesterday was 29 degrees the highest temperature ever recorded in May.  Next, I will be blamed for Global Warming... well anything is warmer than the Ice Age and I sure wasn't around then so can't get the blame for that.... can I?

All this Orbtastic conversation has lured me away from the already penetrating smell of a little piece of Saddleback cooking away.  I know some veggies among you feel that my meat antics are cruel and mean, well I can tell you first hand that the Parentals only purchase free range meat and all sourced locally or in the case of the Lamb...WALES (my first home and that of the Parentals!) The thought of little piggies roaming the Orchards in the Summer & Autumn months and then all tucked up in deep straw beds in winter makes me comforted that the smell I can smell now is one of a truly, if once happy, pig.  Now, usually we don't get to taste the piggie, the piece is that small I can barely see it in the oven and the light is faulty and it's hidden in the depths of the roasting tin.  If I stretch up onto the oven and place my paws on the handle, I could use my weight to drag it down, but alas the hinges are outsmarting me... I need an accomplice.... Oh Lillibet, come here love and pull on this tea towel whilst I dangle in and reach for the piggie.  She is having none of it, she doesn't want the blame and no reward... shucks, she is growing up!

KS =^..^=

SUNDAY STEALERS

It doesn't take a genius to steal, but it does if you don't want to get caught!

The Parentals decided that a full on Roast Dinner was out of the window this Sunday because they got up late. Oh it's OK, we were fed on time, I made sure of that by waking them up at 5.38am and sitting on their chests until one of them spluttered due to lack of air - well I am am 4k.  If they don't get up then, I sit on the 'full bladder' section and move my feet ever so slightly until it gets the desired effect! 

So, what treats for lunch? They had ham and mustard toasties with tomatoes and lettuce. Oh this is good, ham is good to steal and Faith is one top ham lover.  She is a dab paw at getting a tasty morsel out from under the unsuspecting noses of those Parentals.  She will ask politely for a taste of her favourite ham and when it's not given right away she has a mini tantrum right there and then, screwing her face up and squeaking and stamping paws until she is given a piece.  Lillibet is in on the action now and hooks herself a piece of ham fat that is laying about on the ham paper, but instead of eating it she proceeds to throw it up in the air and play with it.  I Thwak her and reprimand her saying that "Food is not to be played with".  She is such a kid!

I am not meant to have ham at all due to my tummy issues, but I distinctly remember seeing that my chicken tins have 20% ham in them... so why, oh why, can't I have me some as well? ManSLvae thinks I can't see how he sneaks little bits to Faith, do they think I am really dumb?  Well, we showed those Parentals how dumb we all are.  It only took a small diversion of the phone and then a discussion about who was on the phone to allow us to invade their ham packet.  Lillibet was flicking bits of leftover ham all over the place, I was catching them. Faith was just picking out the bits she desired and of course they are devoid of fat!

Well in just a few seconds, we had polished off all of their 'left overs' and had us a very tasty meal. Thanks Dumb Parentals! 

=^..^=

NOMS MACHINE
I can't believe that the little Blue Elf is in strict competition with me and my Noms. Just this morning he has tried to share MY NOMS! He is obviously used to 'many munches' in a bowl all together and I didn't want him to eat my Noms but couldn't help myself about letting him taste my fish buttons, sometimes I can be gracious!  Yesterday, I was terrified of him because he really does make different sounds to us here, a sort of high whine and some chirrupy stuff, it was unnerving to my ears and sent me running every time he came close. Today though, the little blue eating machine greeted me with his tail up by the kitchen door and I accidentally licked him - well he smelled of kitten kibble!He is now playing happily with Lillibet, albeit some parts of the game include intense Thwakking! Lillibet, being two months older is taller and much longer than Otello and where Otello is beautifully plush, Lillibet is all spiky and muscular! They get on well, but won't sleep, so Momma has to separate them and put them to bed for a nap. Even though the clocks have gone forward, it seems that getting up at 6am (new time) is taking it's toll on the Parentals and I sure one of them may take a nap soon too!  Bagsy the blankie!

In the meantime, there is a distinct smell of roast Pork today and all the crackling the works. I have been busy kitten sitting and hadn't really noticed that it had been carved. I take my place on the sofa next to Momma on the blankie and proceed to purr and purr until she relents and gives me a tiny piece of the piggy! Just for good measure, I lay my tail in her gravy to get an extra snack but not before slapping around the face with it for good measure! Of which I have a tail AND a face to lick. ManSlave looks upon us with disgust and shakes his head.  Whilst he has his eyes half shut with the shaking of his head and the 'tutting' I race over and pinch his crackling! "SLINKY" ManSLave shouts as a I run and chew, it was worth the slapped arse! 

KS =^..^= 

SOMETHING SMELLS GOOD

It has to be said that this week my Licker has gotten me into terrible trouble.  The Parentals have left out morsels of edible and non edible things for me to try out my taste buds on.  

On Monday I had me some grated carrot.  Lillibet was so entertained by the carrot strips that Momma gave her a few to play with and I was there to catch them, mouth open, as she tossed them into the air or patted them along the floor.  They were refreshing and I can now see a little better too!  

On Tuesday I begged and begged at ManSlaves plate for a taste of his Chicken Piri Piri.  I wished I hadn't now, because he dipped his finger in the homemade sauce and WOWZERS it was hot! Note to self.... do NOT lick your bum!

On Wednesday I found an escaped ice cube that had rattled out of the freezer compartment, it was a great game following it around the floor and making wet trails all over the kitchen.  It finally lay exasperated in a heap and melted away, where upon a few moments later ManSlave enters stage left and steps in it and it seeps through his sock! He said something unmentionable!

Thursday came and went with not many things to set my Licker upon, it felt redundant and useless so I put it to work cleaning 'bits' of this and that from the carpet that the vacuum had missed. Mmmm, I found a shriveled up piece of carrot from Monday under the washing machine too, bonus! I even did a tour of the fish tank lids and licked off all the fish food that had melted onto the glass near the feed hole, they were all spotless when I was done. Momma should be pleased I thought, but she wasn't impressed, I don't get it?

Friday was a busy day, ManSlave had been in the attic and there were copious amounts of fluff and tundra that fell from the big black hole and Faith was determined that she could climb the ladder and escape to freedom, she changed her mind and stood at the top screaming for Momma to come and get her, it was dark up there and ManSlave only had a torch enough for one. I had to use my licker to wash her all over because she was scared and it settled her nerves.  She always tastes sweet and soft. Bubba Lish Baby Delicious.

On Saturday, Momma purchased some avocado soap for her face, it's full of vitamin E and apparently good for you.  First I licked it and then I bit down really hard because it smelled so good and as you know, us Felines eat by smell. My mouth started to foam and the suds mounted up - I opened my mouth to Yawp but a big bubble came out instead and drifted away, it drifted to ManSlave who thought... 'Ohhh bubbles' and popped it. Trapped inside was my YAWP and it nearly deafened him! I was caught then, 'red pawed', mouth full of green soap and looking very sorry for my self.

Today is Sunday, I know this as late last night a little piece of Welsh Lamb was anointed in garlic, acasia honey and salt and put in the fridge to 'meld'.  Today will be it's cooking day, the oven has gone onto a cool oven and it will be slow cooked for a few hours and tease my taste buds.  My Licker is feeling better after yesterdays avocado soap fest and I am limbering up for a taste of that special smell any time soon. The light is on, I am on full alert and will notify the Parentals when I think it's ready for testing. Wish me luck.

KS =^..^=

LOVE IS IN THE AIR
Now I can honestly say that when Momma first returned home from looking after a number of Selkirk Rex this weekend I was a little miffed.  It all started on Friday night when unceremoniously, I was dumped from a warm lap so that Momma could go and 'do her duty'.  When she came home, I was a bit miffed because she smelled like boy cats.  Oh no, not boy cats I thought, where is this going?  But as she stripped down to her thermal undies I got me a whiff of lady cat on the leg of her trousers.  I thought, oh yes, this one smells pretty!  She smells all silvery and sweet and very very pure. Momma tells me her name is Mabel and that she is a dreamy little soul.  I went for a nap and dreamed of this little piece of fluff sitting on my head.

These Selkirks must be big cats, they smell big.  When Momma came home this morning I did HISS and GROWL at her.  Seriously, I don't know what came over me?  I have never in all my life GROWLED at Momma.  She was taken aback, I could see it in her eyes, she was a little nervous of me for a second or two because I have never ever made this noise before to her. I felt really bad, but couldn't help it.  After she showered and changed I was OK again and gave her lots of fuss in case she was thinking I didn't love her anymore and I also wasn't to be fed at tea time!  In amongst all the smells today was one of my favourites, Roast Pork from a little Gloucestershire Old Spot.  Sure was yummy.  Had me a little piece of that in my dish.  I always get a little piece if I am good and I think I must have deserved it as I didn't even YAWP! (told you I felt bad about the GROWLING)

KS =^..^=

THE ROYAL WAVE

Yesterday saw Lillibet take to the stage on Momma's stall at a local cat show.  She had a special pen constructed of red velvet, a crown bed and lots of gold and diamonds.  After all, we are royalty and she is more so being an Elizabethan Poem! She sat elegantly all day on her heated pad showing off her Jewelery which was made especially for her out of cultured pearls to match her colouring.  She purred and purred all day at anyone that wished to speak to her.  She was a real princess and so well behaved.  Well apart from when a Judge made a comment about her nose that was less than complimentary and she struggled and scratched the fleshy part of his under wrist. Outch! She wasn't having any of that, because she knows she is perfect. 

Because Lillibet & Momma had been out all day working the crowds, today we all did nothing but watch a film and snuggle on the sofa.  ManSlave had the food under control and he was torturing a piece of Welsh Lamb with some red wine.  Why did he mess with it? I could have had me some of that if he had just left it alone with a tad of salt. I, of course Yawped and Yawped because it smelled so good.  It was futile because wine would not agree with my troublesome tummy. Dang... I was sure it was a dead cert today too!  Well no doubt the princess thing will go to Lillibet's head and she will make us all bow down to her desires and needs and demand much more love that she rightly needs, but that's princesses for you, all tantrums and tiaras! 

KS =^..^=

BOXING CLEAVER

I have been awakened by the aroma of Roast Pork.  Well if the Parentals are trying to make up for not being home last Sunday, they sure are doing a grand job of apologizing.  My sensory buds are alive and I haven't stopped YAWPING all morning in the hope that this may bring a taste of the piggy.  I am still YAWPING unashamedly even as I type as my tummy is doing somersaults with anticipation of a singular lick of an abandoned plate!

On the subject of somersaults, Mr.Zeus and Lillibet had the funniest half hour with an old Xmas box.  Mr.Zeus was so happy to find it on the landing and made it his own.  He was ecstatic that he alone was invisible to everyone around him and he could snoop and watch Lillibet mooching about.  Well he made the mistake of moving and the shuffle drew the attentions of a very curious Lillibet who wanted the box more than Mr. Zeus and set about getting 'just what she wanted'.  Oh poor Mr.Zeus did look terribly perplexed at times as she took over his little domain and wouldn't let him back in.  Of course, no one is in the box now, abandoned for some other challenge.  Maybe I will have a snooze in it later!  Check out the BOXING CLEAVER action here

Until then, I am pounding the kitchen sides, kissing unweary foreheads as they bend to cut and trim carrots.  Making my self very noticeable by helping to stir the gravy with my paw! Really, will I ever get a piece of this smell that is driving me to distraction.  How it never effects any other cat in the house is beyond me?  Are their sensory powers of scent totally lost?  Who knows, all i know is I will continue the YAWPING until one of parentals relents and gives me the crackling!

KS =^..^=

THERE IS NO BUSINESS LIKE SNOW BUSINESS!

Yes!  This is me, I actually love the snow.  I sit at the window at the top of the cat post and YAWP and pad my paws simultaneously on the glass making an infernal noise and all to be let out in the white stuff.  I raced out with some enthusiasm for a sniff and a wander only to find that it was up to my tummy and I had to raise myself right up onto my tippy toes to stop my belly from freezing.  It was cold, but I did manage a few minutes running here and there making the most of my freedom!

Finally, I relented to cold paws, legs and nipples and headed inside, some would think leisurely, but I entered the house at the speed of light, flashing hither & thither YAWPING at full volume to alert everyone that I had been out in the big wide white world without them.  I was promptly dried and warmed in a big blankie (Courtesy of Eva & David in Ireland) and settled down for a nap... It wasn't to be!  I was so excited still and took off around the house again belting out a song of 'It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas' until I was cut short and packed into the cat bed once again as now everyone was running around the house singing it and Momma was loosing her tiny mind. (ManSlave has already lost his!)

At least when I fell asleep there was the delicious smell of Roast Dinner filling my senses and making me drift on a meaty cloud to perfect dreams of a Smörgåsbord of feline delights.  I was drifting along, belly down, on a plate of Roast Beef and all the trimmings just munching away when I felt empty again. I was chewing on a big slab of beef which became tough and wriggly to manage, so I bit into it with all my mite, only to be woken by a screaming Lillibet with a very sore bum!

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CHASE FOR LIFE!

It's Sunday again and my nostrils have been awoken to the smell of Summer Lamb roasting in the Oven.  I can tell it's Summer Lamb as it smells a tad more goaty in the kitchen. I was in a deep sleep, contemplating life when the aroma hit me and even though my body wasn't fully awake my senses were.  It has made me all excited and I can't stop running about the house shouting for the others to get up and come and smell the smell.  You see, with the Parentals having been full of bugs and stuff, it is the first Roast Dinner since Xmas Day - so it's worth celebrating don't you think?

Well, I raced off to Tell Mr.Zeus, but there was something in the way that he looked at me this morning that made me edgy, so I Thwakked him a big Thwak and he ran like a whirlwind around the house. I think it's his tail that makes me want to chase him more and more, he fluffs it out and just runs blind with this foxy bushy tail following him and it's that I believe that turns a little light Thwakking into a household game!  Well this morning, that very game got out of hand as Faith joined in, but not just chasing Mr.Zeus but laid into me as well.  For a low violence cat, she can't half pack a Thwak or two.  She won't let up now and is pursuing everyone with blown up fur, whirlygig eyes and a voice on it like a banshee.  OMC! Her hormones are still raging and she is skittering about, thrashing everyone and protecting Lillibet (at the same time as telling her off for being so clingy!) Lillibet is cowered on Momma's lap and Faith keeps running between us and her.  "RIGHT" said Momma in a large voice. Everyone stands like statues, mid hiss and spit.  She swoops the screaming Faith up, Faith is shouting foul language at Momma, Momma talks to her in a firm voice and Faith squeaks in between screaming at anyone that dares to move! She is put in the 'Kitten Room with Lillibet'.  Momma has peeled Mr.Zeus from the windowsill where he was hiding, head first like an Ostrich, under the curtain - totally invisible to the naked eye of course!  I on the other hand, because I feel so frisky, am YAWPING at to top of my lungs because I can't understand why I have been ignored when it was my fault!  I don't get Parentals, am I not supposed to get a telling off for being a vindictive little monkey?  Nope, apparently, we are only rewarded for good actions in our house, positive reinforcement  they call it... well let me reinforce this..... I WANT WHAT I WANT AND I WANT IT NOW! Whatever it may be... Fluffy tail, more kibble, a lamb roast, Momma all to my self with out some little chocolate drop kitten cellotaped to her 24/7! YAWP YAWP YAWP