Spring has well and truly sprung. Each day there is something new in the garden is peeping up from the warmed soil and this year ManSlave has been banned from needlessly pulling up weeds, which Momma states every year are not weeds so this season there are Periwinkles, Honesty, Violas, Forget-Me-Nots, Aqualigias and Wild Geraniums all making their debut.  And anyone who ventures into the wood chips has been relocated back into the borders.  All these things, The Horrible Horraces do not like the taste of and give early food for the bees.  To help those little Bees along, Momma planted 20 Osteospermums and this morning there was devastation and all their happy little open faces have been removed and petals devoured by those retched Squirrels. Just let me at 'em Momma, I will give them whats for! 

Those Horraces are getting totally brazen as are some of the frequenting song birds.  Magnus Rex is out in the garden most days for a few hours, he is on a diet, so moving about is much healthier for him and keeping him neater and slimmer in the process.  There is one Horrace that just sits doing his thing whilst his wife is feeding the kids back at the dray.  He teases us cats and sits just out of paw reach and he rattles his tail as a warning. At the same time Mr Robin has been particularly feisty and flying so near to Magnus that a meow would knock him out, then, when Magnus jumps lazily for him, he hovers like a helicopter, then bounce lands and repeats his moves and Magnus Rex chatters with annoyance.   Momma goes out about 7pm to lock up and Magnus Rex sat proudly on his scratch post, inside his house with Mr Robin sleeping next to him.  We didn't know he had it in him, I guess if you tease a cat daily for weeks and you think he is your friend and you are on a diet, you also become the menu!  Momma patted his big soft flat head and kissed his nose and told Magnus Rex in a silly happy voice how very sad it was and what a naughty but clever boy he was and promptly buried Mr. Robin in the flower bed with a heavy heart. 

Because of the recent murder of Cock-sure Robin, no one has been able to have garden time now without supervision.  A real shame as the majority of us are really well behaved.  Faith and Lillibet are also on a trim and fitness regime after a winter slothing about in the office.  They each have to lose about 200g just to give them each a waste.  Faith will always have that 'extra skin' hanging about her - when it's in your genes, it's in your genes.  Well, there was me, Faith and Lillibet out in the big garden and the rest of the house were in the communal garden.  Only Elton kept making a break for it over the half fence to join us, but Momma was quick to untangle him from the wire where upon he raced about like a hooligan taking Gazoo, Sol, Mae, SaBreena and Filly with him in a fit of excitement skidding through the kitchen on the door mat and riding it back again like a magic carpet and each time they passed, Flaire grabbed out at them snarling her authority.  The excitement was contagious as Faith began to join in and picked herself out a Horrace to chase and round and round the garden she whizzed with the Horrace just a jump and tail twitch ahead of her with the steely look of 'Try it Biatch, I dare you' on the Rodents face.  

That made Faith full of herself all day and on and on she 'mepped' telling everyone how she chased that vermin out of the garden.  The reality was short bursts of a wobbling black cat in high heels with her petty-coats hitched up to her ankles in a high tiptoeing gait as the Horrace stuck out it's tongue and sent raspberries in her direction.  She was exhausted by teatime and so was the tired Horrace, who lay spreadeagled on the roof of the House of Fun laughing his tiny socks off. That was all too much for Gazoo, on a mad dash from the kitchen, up the wire section and randomly found herself on the same roof and took that Horrace by surprise. We all shouted our encouragement and she made the fastest dash,  paws outstretched and a wild 'FREEEEEDOM' came out of her mouth like a strangles sheep as she pounced and dug her teeth into a  frenzy of grey tail.  That Horrace vanished over the roof with Gazoo following so closely Momma thought she would lose her into the wilderness forever.  Luckily, the hose had just enough water in it to bring her down to earth with soggy bump.  She was a devil to catch so I helped by chasing her along the fence, back onto the roof and down into the communal area.  "It's Ok Momma, Good job I was there."  She is a wildling that Gazoo.  She is my family, I know how she thinks.  With a sharp slap across the backside, she was in the house again whereupon I fell helplessly on the floor, unable to stand, squirming about for my applause and to be swept up and kissed....all of which happened and made me all squirmy and jolly. 

Today is going to go at a slower pace, the Bank Holiday rains have come and we are all looking out of the windows at the pasty grey outside and allowing the Horraces to go about their day unscathed and there will be Sunday Mass for Mr Robin soul, may he rest in peace.  Another thing that gets to rest in peace today is the tasty leg of lamb that ManSlave has brought home from the farm shop.  It's their own lamb this year, Welsh Lamb, English grass.  Mae had her first foray into what this is all about last weekend with a side of beef.  I have stayed close to her teaching her the ways of the Sunday Roast.  She had a sneaky lick whilst ManSlave was preparing potatoes, her tongue got stuck on the fatty bit so ManSlave trimmed it off and shared it between us.  She is learning fast this little blue and white bundle of cuteness.  I feel I can train her up quite well.

Enjoy the rest of your Hollibobs folks.  With love from your QUEEN VEE =^..^=

​I think at one time or another we have all fallen foul of getting totally and utterly lost or stuck and usually, after such a fright, we don’t do it again.  Only today, we heard about Filly’s Cousin who took a car ride under the bonnet of a van only to be found by the mechanic 8 miles away from home.  A Mechanic in a panic for sure and we have all been warned that if any of us try a great escape like that – we may not be as lucky!

SaBreena took a walk on the wild side a few weeks back when the sun was shining. Unbeknown to Momma, there was a hole in the catproof fencing made, of course, by a Horrible Horrace.  SaBreena is a huge Horrace fan and watches the clever little rodents about their work and being a smart arse, she copied their actions and made good her escape.  It took Momma and ManSlave and a very long ladder to get her down from the roof.  She attempted it another few times and was finally caught in the act and the netting was repaired with cable ties.  The next time she went to scale the 6ft fence, hanging on like a primate, pushing her face into the netting to find a gap, she was thwarted and finally jumped down with an almighty huff and slunk back inside, face all ruffled and fur in square tufts from the netting. 

I too have been up on that roof and there is an amazing view of the tops of bushes where tiny birds land and tweet away hunting for spiders and bugs.  The sparrows, Wrens, Tits and Dunnocks all tootle about around there and Mr & Mrs Blackbird have their nest deep inside the prickly bush and they shout and scream at us which is usually how we are spotted my ManSlave and ‘rescued’.  Pfft. It’s not like we are stuck up there, we are cats don’t you know.  Although, I do know for a fact, there really is no safe way down and it is through fear and worry that I cling to him on the 10ft decent. I do envy those little birds each evening as they sun themselves and flick about in the dust and watch the sun go down.  When I rolled about in that dust, I got mites and was itching for days.   

Since Magnus Rex’s little foray into the wilderness, he has never ventured past the end of his nose and sticks around his enclosure and just shouts suggestive comments anyone and everyone.  He is like one of those mouthy builders yelling down lewd comments to the women below. “Ere love, wanna take a walk with me on my meat rack?” He just can’t help himself. It’s his Viking ‘name sake’ blood of The Great King Canute.  Rape, pillage and plough the land, or any girl cats who fancy a ploughing too!  They all shout back as he is quite tasty looking with his white tash, muscular body and spats.  But he had better watch out that the law of Momma doesn’t crack down on his unsolicited wolf-whistling, catcalling and skirt bothering behaviours.  It just won’t do in today’s society and we don’t want the neighbours complaining.

Ikon used to be a skirt botherer, but now he is more of a Horrace fancier since his PomPoms were removed.  Those Horraces tease him rotten with their squirrely ways.  He spends hours in the garden just watching them and they come so close, within sniffing distance and then rattle their tails, bark, snort and scream muk-muk quaa at him and go about their business of stealing 20mm gravel and slate and burying it in Momma’s Potato boxes.   Only yesterday a Horrace entered his cat run and he just sat there whilst it climbed his tree and stashed a piece of gravel in the fork of the branches and left the way he came in.  Ikon then went on to find said gravel and boot it about the enclosure for a good 10 minutes until he lost it under his cat wheel.  ManSlave found him hours later on the cold stone floor waiting for it to reappear.  What a silly boy. 

Ikon has been in the house much more of late and when he comes in he reminds me of one of those bully boys in Private school. The ones who put bars of soap in their socks and go about beating up the weaklings for their pocket money.  I have on occasion been at the receiving end of said sock and the wrath of his almighty orangeness.  He, only this week, came at me with his sock and I cowered in the corner where he hit me over and over with it and I did a little pee-pee.  He really is a big scary beast, akin to an Ethiopian Gelada with the big wafting mane and muscles.  So now, when he is in the house, we are separated for good measure and he can pick on someone his own size.

There have been a few more escapes of late.  Filly’s kittens are full grown minicats now and have the knack and speed of land lizards and just as slippery.  It is not so much escape as attack leaving the fumbling humans to take pot luck and grab their eel like bodies as they slip into and out of rooms like water and trap themselves in cupboards that are only opened fleetingly.  Of course, we have all done it at one time or another and some of us sill do.  Gazoo, Elton, Sol, SaBreena and moi. The food cupboard is the place to be and whilst ManSlave gets out Horrace food, in we nip and climb to the top and knock all the little things off from the shelves which land in the Horrace food bucket which then topples forwards against the door.  Then we cry and create in there to be let out and roll about laughing as down tumbles all the goodies and a bucket of loose sunflower seeds all over the floor.  We jump free and race about the house in hysterical mewing at having pulled off the best trick ever. 

Well, I am going to make good my escape now and find me a nice warm spot to curl up on.  Now the kittens have departed, there is so much more space to select for midday naps and a good cleaning session to plot our next adventures from.

From your ever doting Queen Vee =^..^=

Escapology is a fine art and not everyone is good at it and some want to escape but can't.  It all boils down to cat flaps and who can go where and when.  I, for example, am happy to use a cat flap if there is food on one side and and it requires snuffling down particularly if it's not for you!!

We have, in total, seven cat flaps here at Maystar HQ. It's like Fort Knox in the Kitten Room with one to get into the room and a further one to get into the Kitten Pen.  Then there is a double one in the kitchen, one each side of the going out wall and the coming in wall where there is the cavity wall to negotiate.  It's tight and you have to be quite svelt to fit through both.  Each of the Stud Houses have one too.  But only the kitten room has the special microchip type so only mummy cats can come and go...well, that is unless you are super smart!

There have been a couple of cases recently where I have let my tummy rule my mind and found myself in quite the predicament.  May I also add that Flaire started all this and I was merely being a copycat!. There is a cat flap into the kitten pen so Mummy cats can go and visit their babies.  You don't need a chip to enter, but you do to leave this is mainly due to baby cats learning how the door works and Momma's laziness at not removing it after the little ones have flown the nest.  I followed Flaire's example and got well and truly trapped in there.  I cried and banged on the door, but Momma and ManSlave were out. When they came home, they heard mewling.  Momma looked everywhere and still I couldn't be found. ManSlave said that it can't be that hard as we didn't live in a mansion!!!  They both looked and each time anyone came near to where I was stuck, I was so quiet and hid in the hooded bed in the dark recess of the kitten pen and held my breath.  I watched them check everywhere then I couldn't hold my breath any longer and my tummy was rumbling and out came a loud squeak and I was found! 

After I made that silly squeak and tumbled out standing on my head, butt in the air and was lifted up and kissed all over which made me very giddy indeed.  They laughed so hard as it reminded them of their first Devon, Dewie, who was stuck up a tree for a whole day and night because he held his breath!  

When Flaire broke in, she ate so much kitten food she made her tummy very sore and stinky.  At least when I did it I only chewed through four tetrapaks of Bozita leaving a trail of liquidy meat juices all over the freshly washed kitten beds which I tried to clean of with my licker but made it worse!  SaBreena broke in once and piddled in all the fresh kitten bedding, Momma was furious.  That is the only unfortunate problem with the 'humane cat trap' you get found out!  What's a bit of washing and drying all day anyway- Momma loves it! 

There is a separate microchip catflap going into the Kitten room which only us girls know how to access and you have to have your microchip registered or you don't get in unless you manage to sneak in unnoticed. However, if you are in there, you can leave anytime you want to.  This, unfortunately, becomes a problem too as some very clever naughty kittens of FillyCat's have been doing just that and escaping out of there into the hallways and beyond.  They are just too smart for their own good sometimes. These flaps are all very clever un less you are smarter than the average cat and have opposable thumbs.

Yesterday, Momma started her rounds early morning and there was Sol, outside?  He was moaning, face pressed up against the back door looking distraught and his frozen breath made meow shapes in the frosty glass.  He dashed inside when she opened the door, ears and feet chilled but body all floofed out and warm as toast in his thick coat.  He was definitely in at midnight so she checked the camera.  There, 6.04am he pushes through the first flap squashing himself past the 'thermal hole plug' that even Momma struggles to force into the aperture each night and yank out each morning.  He had pushed it into the cavity wall and then squeezed through to the second door to the outside.  The only unfortunate issue was, he couldn't do the return journey as the 'thermal hole plug' had dropped down against the door, trapping him in the cold morning dew. Luckily, there is a covered cat bed out there to shelter in and I guess he was happy watching the birdies and Horraces. 

Magnus Rex uses his catflap like a battering ram and he launches himself, full speed at it. Crashing through like  a great bull, head down and charge!!!!! The sound it makes and the speed he goes at it is phenomenal.  I do wonder if that's why he is a little brain dead at times being a bit super silly and vacant at times.  Ikon is a different kettle of fish, he will paw and paw and paw at his flap as it must open for him to present himself to the world in all his golden glory.  Then there is Faith who dislikes it when the flap touches her face so she too paws at it and pulls it towards her and ducks underneath.  

SaBreena is a whirlwind and has never cared about such problems. She is a catflap genius. Where as Flaire will only use a cat flap if it is jammed open so she can meander through it - well, that is not entirely true, if she has a kitten or food...she CAN use one, but would rather a clean exit.  unlike Gazoo who can not figure out how the cat flap system even works. She knows she wants to go out but just lays next to like her auto feeder and hopes it will open.  She is a real dope, the Daughter of Magnus Rex, so I am saying nothing!!  She will flounce about the microchip feeders and sloth along until one opens. She has a built in ridiculous notion that everything must be approached  backwards.  She drinks from the water fountain whilst standing looped around a feeder, and one paw on the windowsill.  She even climbs a perfectly good cat tree BACKWARDS?  She is just as quirky as her voice!

Elton is the new fella, he is learning to follow the other bigger cats.  Lillibet doesn't do flaps, she would startve before pushing that piece of plastic with her face. FillyCat always gallops through catflaps and did from day one of arriving. She is a force to be reckoned with and uses them as entertainment like an eventing horse, she hurdles through,, round and back again just for fun.  I do not know where she gets her energy from? 

Today is a special day of new beginnings and much more fruit and veg in the Parentals diets so they are celebrating with a huge forerib of Charolais in the oven. Mmmm.  The light is on, I can see it roasting away and now I am healed with my new pills regime, I may have a small piece of it later with anyone else who manages to get a front row seat on the armchair beside Momma.  Because there is a bone in there we may even get to race it about the floor in a rare treat. Not sure how many nut roasts I shall be blogging about in the future?

It's good to be back and thank you all for being here (there) for the Maystar Pride. 

​Your one and only Queen Vee =^..^=

I have had many questions asking where I have gone? What I have been doing?  Was I ever coming back? Well, I guess the answer to that is I have been well and truly CATatonic with lack of communiCATion and things here have been very compliCATed indeed.  There have been no vacCATions or jollyfiCATions here. Nope, no sir.  Only a small sCATtering of nice things like beautifiCATions when I have a Mani-Pedi or a good grooming.  All else has been a bit of a CATastrophe. 

In November, when I last wrote.  My skin was literally dripping from my bones with sores and my little body was pained and uncomfortable.  I had lost so much weight I was but a grumpy stick of un-wellness.  I was in and out of the vets and spent many a day hospitalised on a drip with pipes here and there to help me breathe.  It was a dreadful month in all honesty and I could barely lift a paw to write about it.  Then, in December, I met a lovely Vet called Mr Godfrey and he set me on the right path with an amazing skin regime and diagnosed me with URTICARIA PIGMENTOSA.  Finally, a name for my condition and a treatment plan. 

I am sat here today with Momma, sending my thoughts through her fingertips to the keyboard, just pouring out how grateful we all are that I am bouncing about like the kitten I am inside and playing, eating and being happy again with no breathing, piddling or skin issues and all from a small dose of antihistamines.  That tiny pill did all this when all other interventions nearly had me, well, very very poorly.  So, I am free of my shackles and with it a breath of fresh air.  Momma came off worse with a tummy ulcer - fancy that! 

In these last four months we have seen kittens leave and kittens being born.  Filly cat has five delightful crazy critters that I have taken under my wing and am teaching them all the naughty things to do.  They follow me about like a chain of baby elephants, nose to tail squeaking as we march.  I have taken on their schooling and education in all matters concerning misbehaving and do not take any rubbish which usually results in a clip around the ear and back in line they get.

We had a new starter too from the house of Lexifers where the great KING SLINKY was born.  He is a red & white midget with huge catitude and absolutely no manners what so ever.  He has taken many clips about his lug holes and is now forming a neat line behind my well trained FILLINGS (FillyCat babies).  His name is Elton, he is far from trained and is very silly, goofy and daft and is always trying to outrun the world.  He has slotted in very well and has a second family in Gazoo & Sol.   Ah, yes, Sol.  He is currently still here after a mishap with his scheduled USA home.  Oh well. He will soon be off to join his full brother Cookie in due course as a wonderful cuddly pet. 

Ikon has continued to have willy problems, then, miraculously it all stopped now he is neutered and Momma is on the hunt for the purrfect home for him.  We are up to 13 cats and the food train is straining at the sides as well as Momma's energy levels.  It has been such a worry that something more serious was wrong with him and he was due to see a specialist if things didn't change soon.  Phew.  More money in the pot for food!

The Horraces have been breeding all winter?  So much for hibernation and slowing down.  Nope, not at Maystar HQ.  They are onto a good thing and must have told the entire woodland as there were 14 of the grey jobbies bouncing about all Winter.  To add to that the Wood Pigeons landed en-mass and brought with them Sparrows, foxes, Hedgehogs and even a flock of tiny Long Tailed Tits.  The Sparrow Hawk was having a field day. Don't mention rats!!!  All this nature in our teeny plot of suburbia.  SaBreena is out there into late cold evenings, thick coat keeping her body taosty, watching life unfold in front of her eyes.  She is the only one brave enough to venture out.  Magnus Rex & Ikon get to chase a few critters but in general, they are both terrified of the Horraces which  yap and launch at them.  Plucky little F@rkers!!

I will endeavor to keep you all up to date with the goings on.  It has just been a bit tricky.  Thank you all for being there out in the world to receive my words - for now I shall bid you farewell.

Your Queen Vee  =^..^=

Well, I am not quite sure where six weeks has vanished to and looking back I had so many funny snippets to tell you all, but alas, my personal assistant has been on strike, pfft, you just can't get the staff these days!!  It has been a whirl wind of six weeks seeing the Breelings grown and leaving home as well as Pearly, who packed her bags well over a month ago and also left home for the life of a true Queen.  It has seen Ikon having huge ups and downs with a very sore willy and FillyCat playing the mating game three times before she got the hang of it. 

It seems weeks ago that Flaire's two boys left for the North of England with their new family who did and incredible 9hr round trip to collect them.  They have slotted into homelife really well with two little people to play with and get up to all sorts of trouble with.  We get the odd update from the Rewcastle family especially when their Dad is back from his driving job.  In the same spirit, two of SaBreena's kittens have also left home together to live with Aunt Missy (Miss Marple - SaBreena's Sister) There are already reports of no sleep in the Quinlan household with Aunt Missy taking over motherly role of wash and brush up before bed and some thieving of their toys.  There are 3 dogs and 4 other cat's to get on with and of course, they have won everyone over already with their crazy antics.  They are living life as kittens should - totally loved and given freedom to be who they are. 

And talking of who they are... There is a little cat who just can't be who she truly is so a huge decision was made for sweet Pearly, SaBreena's Mum and Flaire's Daughter, to pack her bags and leave home on a trial basis.  It all started back in 2020 when Pearly met the Davies family and really liked both Lottie and Neil, who I must add are THE most feline of feline specialists and so kind, calm and gentle and won Pearl's affections which is a rare thing.  They met her twice and finally it was suggested that Pearl would live with them after the recovery from a pyometra and then a long mental recovery time with unusual hormone imbalance despite being neutered which caused awful skin rashes and awful bladder flare ups that went on for months.  This all took a long year and finally, in October, she was ready to begin a new life with her new family. 

I could go on and on about my Cousin in great detail about how she doesn't trust anyone in the world except Momma, how she is picked on and beaten up as well as as her beating up small kittens.....blah blah blah...  Well, Momma delivered her and stayed the weekend to settle her in and how she thrived from the first minutes of arriving. The purr was on and her trust pilot light was lit and she hasn't looked back all thanks to Neil and Lottie's supportive introductions to her Grand Kits, Rufus Rex & Marlee May as well as two large domestic short hairs.  The world is her oyster and she hasn't growled once at anyone!  Makes you puff out your chest with pride - she is a genuine fruit loop but with the right environment, she is a super, funny, light hearted and active girl with so much to give and is so forward, loving and brave too.  It's just incredible. 

I have had my fair share of dramas too with my skin and breathing.  It was quite frightening in October when I had licked kitten tuna and BAM, next thing I was running backwards coughing and inhaling vomit all at once which resulted in a vet visit because I couldn't stop doing it and ended up with food in my lungs and a day on a drip, lots of this and that as well as fluids and medications to take home.  Sigh.  Then my medication attacked me and I could't have that anymore and that's what allows me to eat normal cat food. Sigh.  Then I had to go back to the vet because my skin is sore and my breathing is all over the place and I now have to see a fancy specialist which will use up all of the money Momma saved for her special purrday this year.  Sigh 

Ikon has been suffering from a poorly willy and for some reason, hormones have played a part in his manhood being inflamed and sore.  All tests, scans, thising and thatting have been carried out since may and the vet supported Momma to get a couple of litters from him and also hormone shots to give his pinkie a good healing session - then, out of the blue it all kicked off again, despite not being juiced up....He will be going into see vet Aidin soon to have his pompoms removed and make a very happy lapcat instead.  he is a stress head and yells all day, unlike his chilled out son who doesn't care about yelling.  He also isn't really that fussed with the girls.... well, would you be if you winky was sore?!   Magnus will have to take over from his Father in the stud department.  I wonder if that means he will FINALLY not want to chase me around the garden?  Doubt it, can't get rid of my nemesis that quickly!

FillyCat is finally pregnant after first meeting Ikon and him being totally terrified of her and was found crying at the door of Al-CAT-raz to be let out.  She was having none of it and beat him up so badly that every time he saw her after that, he slunk down and crept away.  Ironically, his Son Magnus Rex, was not to be beaten back so easily and wouldn't take her vile and darned right vicious attacks as a no way jose moment and frequently slapped her as hard as she slapped him.  Round two a few weeks later saw her a little more subdued but she was so nasty every time he grabbed her neck that on the third try, yet a further few weeks later,  resulted in him going free for all, paws behind his head "Yeah baby - take that" - "Look Momma - No Paws."  It was the funniest thing to watch but he was hell bent on getting the technique down to a no touchy feely policy and FillyCat was soon spinning about and rolling around on the deep shag pile mats!  Magnus certainly had to use every inch of subterfuge with her and twenty one days later and she was all ruby red in the 'nips' and hey presto the seeds were sown.   

I am glad I have finally managed to get the scribe to get this job done and I can only send my apologies to those who have nothing better to do than wait avidly for my blogs.  I do hope you haven't forgotten about us and I promise I will save some good news and funny stories for the next installments of Queen Vee's Blogs Posts for you all.

​Thank you loyal subjects - your Queen Vee =^..^=

It feels like furrever since I have managed to tie Momma down to doing a blog.  She just hasn't found life very funny recently with all our antics. Some of which was my fault.  She took me up to bed a few weeks ago and I turned and sprayed all over her belly, she was wearing shorts and after it ran down her legs, all over the end of the bed and soaked into her socks, she just hasn't felt like trusting me since for one on one bed time.  

Ikon started peeing blood and won't shut his howl hole so went to see Vet Aidin who has given him a few months of restbite using Grab-Your-Pen-Tin, or some such drug.  It's working and he is back watching those Horraces and birds outside of his cat pen pod and is allowed out into the garden again for a dash about. All is well with the boys wizzer now and feeling a little more chillaxed.  Well, that was until he met FillyCat.  Oh my, he spent a night with her in Al-CAT-raz and by morning he was crying at the door to be let out as that frilly Filly knickers is a bit of a wildling. When Momma put him back in his CatPod, he had nail husks stuck to his face like porcupine quills.   No worries though, The Great King Canute came to the rescue and took that wild biatch in paw, slapped her about a bit and won her over and came out pretty unscathed.  Three days later, they were like an old married couple arguing over who got the best spot in the sun. 

Lillibet has been a pain in the proverbial.  She had deposited a quantity of chocolate gold on the cat wheel then run like an idiot away from it, sending it spinning from the wheel at high velocity onto every surface.   Momma was not best pleased with her.  She has also been doing dispute piddling in a few inappropriate places. She was never caught in person, but on camera.  HA - GOTCHA!  You see, when I pee, it is a medical condition and I get away with it...but Lillibet is just being darn right naughty and thinks in her pea sized brain, that she is TopCat!  Well, she isn't.  That title falls to SaBreena!  Now that Al-CAT-raz is vacant, Lillibet now has full access to it during the day.  I join her as does Pearl and Faith.  We just mooch about the garden and go for a snack and a nap in the heated beds.  It's like a day spa. Sometimes, Pearl wants to go inside the house and stands on the chair and cries pittifully to be let in.  If she is ignored, she climbs the side of the CatPods, tootles across the SkyBridge and shouts at the window upstairs! 

The only time I want to come in from Horrace Hunting is when ManSlave lets Ikon or Magnus out for a run.  Ikon particularly dislikes me and he really winds me up. When I pass his pen, I spit at him.  He wipes his face and turns his butt to me and shoots a wizz.  Ugh, boy is he vile. A few times I have raced out of the gate before ManSlave can stop me and Ikon has caught me and pasted me.  I hate it so much that I run and I know I shouldn't, but it just happens and voila, I am stuck somewhere and have to be rescued.  Last week I had just had a nice bath and was drying in the sun, ManSlave didn't know I was lounging on the deck rearranging my fur and let Ikon out.  He found me in seconds and had me running everywhere so I scrabbled up inside the clematis nest and waited for Momma to come and rescue me.  She was a bit miffed because I was utterly filthy and covered in nature. 

Flaire's two boys are growing fast and will soon be off for their pompomectomy on Friday.  They will have their second vaccine and a microchip each.  Outchie!  makes one wince to think about it.  They will be a bit cross legged when they get home! Before that, they have had lots of fun in the garden playing with leaves and bugs. They are ever so funny and not shy of a clout from me.  SaBreena had four boys and all of those are pretty spectacular and each one totally different again.  Momma was so pleased she was safe having them and caught her out having them at 4pm when she was just sitting down for a cuppa and a snooze ready for the 'night' ahead.  They are now three weeks and growing like weeds and really magical rainbow colours again. 

Well, that will do you for today.  I have so many small things I meant to say but forgot because there are a few bees flitting in the garden and they need my attention and sitting on the kitchen table is making my butt numb.  Catch you laters gators.

​Your Queen Vee =^..^=

What a few weeks it has been.  I can honestly say it's exhausting living here and I seem to get the blame for everything so much so that I have been shipped off to Al-CAT-raz in the process.  Pfft. I am an indoor cat, that was until I sprayed all over Momma's front and she lost the plot! 
Pearl and I are out together as we are on the same diet and she has a stressed bladder too.  

Flaire is in the kitten room with her two little men and occasionally Gazoo when supervised.  SaBreena is in the main bedroom waiting to pop with kittens and has chosen in there whilst the Flairelings grow enough to manage the landing. Lillibet, when not in the garden, is happy to come and go from the office with Momma leaving just Faith, Gazoo and Filly in the main house.  This has cut down on the continuous urinating on the landing outside the doors, on the cat wheel, in the bath, on the bathroom floor on the mat next to the litter tray on towels and especially and uniquely on the towel that lays under the washing machine to catch drips - our drips!   

The final straw came when there was a transient smell of wee drifting about that Momma could neither track down, nor find with her CSI black light making the house look from the outside like a 1980s disco.  Nope the smell was there, but no wee?!  It was driving her insane!  Then one afternoon, ManSlave sat down and Gazoo smelled his socks and then he smelled his socks and then Momma smelled his socks and began to laugh like a crazy woman as she went out to the hallway and smelled his stinky left shoe, there it was - One of my special tinkles on his birthday in his shoe because I love him SO much and didn't have any other way of showing him.  THAT was the day Pearl and I were shipped out to the 'rock'.  Like most inmates, it was a crime of passion!

Not that I have been inside the house for two days due to the fact I peed in the kitchen after a nights reprieve.  Momma watched me on the camera, sneaky peeping tom she is, spying on me relieving myself on her socks on the kitchen table, pfft, but I do have to say, the house was much sweeter smelling without the widdles and the house cats were all chillaxed too.  I do have to say that I have a urinary infection which is being treated by the vet and so does Lillibet so some of this peeing is not our faults!  Momma paid out millions of cat kibbles to have it all tested and that dreaded E-coli is still causing us major amounts of issues.  We are not even sure how or why it's happening as the entire house is solid as the proverbial rock in the gut department with chocolate gold being like bars of bullion.  I guess it might eventually 'do one' and leave us alone especially as there is absolutely no more raw treats or meals every again to be served in this house.  Gone has the strip of steak or lamb.  The meaty love affair is over.  This is case no 9 that has struck and the only place this drug resistant bug has come from is the raw bunny.  

I am so heartbroken I am unable to see the Sunday lunch cooking, especially as the light is now working, but Momma says that ManSlave is still upset with me and I have to wait it out and take my medicine and be a clean kitty before I can watch anymore Oven TV channel. It totally sucks.  I guess we are having a good time in the garden chasing squirrels and such like, so that part isn't too bad as those pesky young Horraces are really bolshy and brave now.  Faith and I pincer moved one for Lillibet to catch but she was slow on the uptake and let him slip away.  Pearl was too busy climbing the Catio door to get back in for fear of being eaten alive by a baby Horrace.   Of course, as most things, there was a downside to being allowed out, flea and mite drops as those Horraces could be carrying all sorts.  On went the drops and out fell my fur.... Seriously, I am as bald as a coot as it Faith.  That is some powerful stuff and to think we shared it between 5 of us.  Luckily Pearl, Magnus and Ikon are OK and kept their coats on.  Faith and I ,look like a pair of unloved street cats. 

Not feeling very Queenly this week - Your Queen Pee, I mean Vee. =^..^=

What a wonderful few weeks of Orb Shine we have been experiencing and there has been so much for us to do, especially Faith, Lillibet and myself.  We have been allowed out into the entire garden to mooch and wander around with no one watching us.  It seems we are all to be greatly trusted and to be honest, it has been really wonderful and only once did I get a bit over excited and landed over the fence, screaming like a banshee for someone to catch me.  I slithered about with my back claws on the outside of the fence with the black thorn poking me in the butt from beneath as I scrabbled for leverage holding on with my front paws doing a great set of chin ups to rival even the best athletes.  Luckily, Momma heard me and came to my rescue.  I went all silly, falling on my head, scooting about on my side with my butt in the air, tail thrashing and purring up a storm.  Needless to say, I have not been over the fence again. 

You may be wondering how I managed to find myself atop a 6ft fence? Well, I have been chasing me some Horrace youngangs and they are mighily quick and naughty and been teasing Lillibet and myself for the entire week.  Lillibet and I are great stalkers and being chocolate on top, we hunker down on the wood chips and we are like a pair of hungry furry carpets.  I have been chatting to ManSlave to see if he was willing to stick some peanuts to our backs to give us a fighting chance, but he said that would be daft.  Pfft. Some help he is!  they are pesky, these Horraces, they sit just inches from our faces and waft their tails across our sniffers which tickles, but neither of us can get up the nerve to jump on them because they make a rattling sound with their tails and chatter with their teeth.  The only time we pounce on them, they just jump a few feet away and turn on us.  Then, one of them RAN..... that was it, a great game of chase took place with a mad zoom around the garden and the baby Horrace was panting and heaving his chest in and out on top of the fence post and I made my leap and being not quite as agile I teetered on the 5mm thick featheredging and that's where that Horrace rushed at me, took a flying leap like a ninja and kicked me in the face and I tumbled over the fence.    

Faith takes a much more laid back approach to being in the garden and occasionally takes a turn around the pathways, racing up and down at high speed, then out to the side garden for some much needed Orb Bathing under the sunbeds.  It's very cool under there and we get to kiss Momma and lay under her shading sail and get in the way whilst she reads her book.  Lillibet likes to lay on the slabs in the shade of the potato plants and watches the flying ants leave their nests.  Momma thought it a good idea to lock us out in a trio to determine who was doing the widdling on the wheel and I have to say - I HAVE A CLEAN SLATE - it was not me 'this time', nope, it was Lillibet!  How very naughty is THAT?  Momma took her to see Vet Ali and requested her usual 18mth bloods for a health check which came back that she is in the peak of health. So, it looks like NCS (Naughty Cat Syndrome). Hmmm, Not like me with my crystals having an excuse, hers was sheer bulshy biatchness.  In the mornings, she is put into the bathroom (as currently cooler than the office) and she has to use some special litter to check the type of wee she is producing and once she has used the facilities she can go out into the garden for a few hours time out. Well, we like to keep Momma on her toes!

Momma said we should name the new Horraces and because this particular friendly one only has one ear, I decided to call him Auris after the latin for ear and it sounds like Horrace if you mew it quickly.  Momma said that I wasn't then allowed to catch him and lick him once he was named which is quite ashame really seeing as the oven engineer has been with our part from Germany to make the light come on again.  I could have watched him bake until crispy for squirrel snacks.  Momma makes us freeze dried tuna in her machine, I wonder if she would allow a few strips of rodent in there with her pear fruit leathers? 

Until next week y'all, your Queen Vee =^..^=

Here we are, Momma and I back on the plan and typing up my blog.  I like to take prime position in front of the screen so that me thoughts flow through me onto the page, so to speak.  I would like to tell you about the naming of cats.  A cat has many names from the household pet names to the glorious Sunday names.  I suppose, being Queen of all she prevails, defender of the realm, I should go first!  

My Sunday name is Champion Maystarex Empress Of India after the great Queen Victoria of England. I nearly got called Chevron on account of my inverted 'V' on my face and thus I became Vee and a Viktori Vee to boot, yes, like the unique tasting herbal lozenge "Forged for Strength"!!  Momma likes to play with words, meanings, sentiments and above all a bit of history.  Like my name sake, I have have never been to India and like Queen Victoria do have a Munshi, in fact, several Munchies a day!  My chocolate colouring flows under my ears like the braids worn by her majesty in her youth and my eyes sparkle like the emeralds in her sparkling tiara.  The similarities don't stop there....!  Mrs Brown? - I am chocolate! MOL 

Lately, Momma has been calling me Shamu after the great whale kept in captivity in Florida.  She really is referring to the way in which I circle my prey and swim from place to place when I have been accused of piddling on something.  But I will have you know I am no big fish and it isn't me piddling! HONEST!!!  So, Momma can stop with the name calling! Shamu, pfft.  Just because I am the same colour and jump through hoops for her love and affection. 

Faith also has a special Sunday name which never really gets a mention here in Maystar HQ as like Filly, she is the odd one out from another cattery.  She is named Rexiru Black Envy of which was meant to be all about being a great show cat, all of which, she hated!  Faith has a house name of Bubbah Fishy and if called Faith, it MUST be followed by 'Honey' or she will ignore you!  Bubbah Fish grew from her love of salmon and the fact she was once, the baby of the family!  Ten years on and she is the matriarch and very good at her top position.  She never really was a Queen like me, she has always been a Princess and is often referred to as such in general conversations.  The neighbours must think we have 20 cats here as Momma calls "Bubbah Fishy, Faith Honey, Princess." in reality it's just one pusser!  

Her Daughter, Maystarex Elizabethan Poem, Lillibet also has a number of names too and like me she is named after a Queen, our Queen Elizabeth or Lilibet to her family.  Our little Queen has a double L!  She has her special names and her silly names such a Bitty Bean, a label taken from Little Britain after her tiny cat boobs grew huge and the term 'Bitty' stuck. She also has her own toys and manufactures those under the name of LilliLongLegs because her leggies are so very very long and she loved green beans so much as a kitten, playing with the bean string for hours so Bitty became Bitty Bean and now just Bitty B.  She likes that name, it suits her and she purrs and chirrups with love and pride when she is told how pretty she is and kissed and snuggled.  Well, I don't do all that with her, she is a whakkamonster and I call her the Gruppenfuhrer or Stair Troll.  No one messes about running the gauntlet with her standing in the way.  Kittens boast that they have made it safely past her, whilst others lick their wounds, She is demonic in her strikes!

Flaire has a beautiful name Grand Champion Maystarex Queen of Scots and has taken the name of Mary "Wished for child" and I often quote 'Mary Mary quite contrary' at her as she is a big bossy boots and rules the house with an iron paw.  Momma calls her Girlfriend as she suckers up to ManSlave for kisses and extramarital affairs of the whisker pads where ManSlave  caresses her ripples and calls her Blue Eyes.  It's enough to make a cat puke and blush in equal measure.  When she is being all mushy and sweet and loves Momma, she is rewarded with a Poppet or a Poppalopolis which makes her all gooey and adorable and even purrs.  Pfft.  My Sister NEVER purrs unless she wants something. Unlike all of us who purr on command!  When you hear F-L-A-I-R-EEEEEE you know she is in trouble and has clouted some poor unsuspecting kitten around their hearing devices.  Really, although she rules, she is a weak ruler and runs from conflict moaning and hissing.  

​I don't know if it's the fact we have all been here the longest or that we are the naughtiest that we have all these names?  Momma even has a song for some of us.  Here is mine....

"Oh GlOrY-ouse (sound like mouse)
ik-A-TORI-ouse (sounds like mouse)
She is A-DOOR-A-BULL.
Oh she is loved
By all OF-OUSE
And marches too and fro"

Ok, it doesn't rhyme but I love it and trot about striding out with my paws flicking them in a marching frenzy to the sultry beat of my British style monarchy tune.    Flaire's is a bit more technical and rappy and makes her purr loudly and  goes something like this....

Poppolopolis, born in a metropolis
Wants to give me a KISS
On her throne in the Acropolis
Wants to give them a KISS
Waves her tail at the megalopolis
They want to give her a KISS
The great Queen and Prophetess 
The all loving Poppalopalis
Only gives ManSlave a KISS 

To me, it's a bit OTT, but hey, she is a year older than me and holds her crown on straight. Mine is a bit crooked and I can't help be a bit naughty and talking of naughty, the light is still fascinatingly on in the oven and today I am watching wait baited breath as beef shins cook away for hours and hours.  I never knew cows had shins really and can only hope they are adorned with shin pads to keep them tender, unlike ManSlaves shins which are dented and broken after a few rough hockey matches in his youth.  Although, the thought of cows playing hockey is quite something and a bit of a barnburner! 

What are your pet names followers? Are you willing to share a toots, a snugglebum, snookums with us? 

Your loyal and devoted Queen Vee =^..^=

How I have wanted to update you all with the too and fro at Maystar HQ but Momma has been super busy catching her tail and her breath to help me sit and paw through the trivia that hath bestowed us recently.   It all began when SaBreena took poorly and had to start on a long road to cleaning out her sticky uterus. Apparently, it was the dreaded E-coli bug that had swum up and into her fairy and created a real mess is there.  A few weeks on and the vet recommends mating her again, despite only having kittens earlier in the year.  Damn Pyometra!  She has been singing for boys for months and finally it turned on her and bit her in the butt.  

Then, not a day later, Pearl took really poorly and was urgently neutered and is still suffering from really awful skin reactions where the injections were given and spread all over her body in big pustular lumps.  She has been in consolable with pain all over her pink little tummy.  now her healing is complete with her spey, she has been able to have some steroids to calm everything down and reset her sore little body.  She also had an injection of antibiotic to halt whatever bacterial thing had taken hold.  Quite in the wars that one and after a few soothing washes she is healed all over.   She is being treated well and trying to keep her calm is paramount currently especially as she thought she was pregnant the whole time..  To top all this off, poor kid has her urinary crystals back and is peeing in short sharp, wincy, bursts.  Meooow!  Momma is giving her wet food with some cider vinegar and cystease and slowly, she is getting balanced again.

One of us is also piddling everywhere.  I hasten to add, it could be me although, I am keeping a very low profile, the kind of low that leaves one slinking along the ground undetected once Momma is on the 'sniff it out' rampage.  I have to say, I look guilty when often I am not... or am I?  I am keeping stum.  Needless to say, I am still receiving tablets and cider vinegar, along with Pearl, to reduce bladder stress.   I am not allowed anything but my food with no treats or extras which is not sitting well at all seeing as every cat in the house gets extras.  It is just not fair.  I won't mention the 2oz of steak that Momma trimmed off for me and the two small wet meals with gravy. OK, sometimes I am a lucky girl.  Well, I have also been afforded a little jaunt or two in the garden too without bounds and fences, just Momma and me time, building things and painting fences.  I am really good and very helpy.  I have only found myself on top of the fence three times.  I just levitate up there somehow? 

Faith and Lillibet have also been trotting about the garden for a few hours a day too which is lots of fun for them and giving them both some much needed time out from kittens running into them.  There are new baby Horraces racing about and creating much entertainment for all three of us.  Sometimes, when not wooing the ladies, Ikon enjoys chasing the odd one about too.  He is quite brave pouncing on their tails and they, totally uncaring, carry on eating their nuts and just flick their tails in his face and chatter at him for being so rude.  They are so darn cheeky those Horraces. They break and eat everything and now putting us cats in our places too.  It won't do, they need more pouncing and jumping on.  Come on Ikon!!

The Roblyings all left home over the last few weekends but Gazoo is still scooting about creating havoc, chasing Filly Cat, who was her best friend until she began to get hormonal and began attacking her quite heavily.  I gave Filly a few head thwaks but still she pounds into Gazoo, hissing and spitting.  She had to be separated into the kitchen.  Such a shame as Gazoo will need a mate soon when her Mum, Robyn, goes off to her new home.  Filly is beginning to calm, but personally, I feel she needs to just get on and have kittens now before she kills one of us!  

Talking of kittens, Flaire and Ikon announced their new babies, two boys.  Not bad for Ikon's second mating and the first after his Neuter-UM chip.  I love trying to visit my Sister and take a sneak peek at her sons.  They are so cute and quite lickable really.  They are nearly two weeks old and Momma had to hand feed them again for 20hours due to the blood groups being different. They managed really well, albeit very exhausted by the end of the three days it took for the labour, birth, feeding and latching them back onto Mum.  Flaire is well and happy and loves her boys so much, always squeaking and chirruping to them. It will be good for Gazoo to have someone to play with and still be a kitten for awhile longer. 

Another great thing that happened is the oven man arrived last week with a new light unit, so after waiting months for the part to arrive from Germany, I can now dive into to the world of roast Sunday lunches once again and there has been great interest in the cooking of things again.  Today is a plump chook, a red leg Leicester.  No doubt we won't get any at all, but hey, I can watch it cook!  What more does a girl need? 

I shall try my best to keep up with the blogs.  Sometimes, things are just so sad that it's very hard to make things sound fun and entertaining - so here you have it.... 

All my purrs, Queen Vee

It occurs to me that I have not been on the Cat Wheel for some time now and even if I did fancy it, it always seems to be occupied by a number of other pussers keeping fit, trim and stress free.  They all wait in line to use the new treadmill outside the backdoor. It's a running frenzie and each with their tiny FitBits counting steps for their ten millionth step per day.  Who can run the most and who can look the best whilst doing it?  Not me - the wheel is for sitting on and perhaps watching birdies from or catching a good squirrel fight.  Horrible Horrace has had so many babies that they too will soon need wheels to keep them entertaining them, entertaining us!  

I have to start with Filly because she is new to the treadmill torture.  She started slow and steady with the odd walk, then, once she got the hang of it she really began to move as one with the wheel and running has become her new passion of which she meows happily as she trots to her own pace in life. Fast and furious! She sings the 'song of her people' as she hacks along at a fine pace. Filly is closer to Pearl and I than anyone else in the house and follows the same rhythm with a good long stretchy run. ​

SaBreena is always a great runner and can do just the fastest paces in the house.  I thought, in my hay day, that I was the very best but alas, she has beaten my record in that arena with complete ease.  She is built for speed, shaped more like a cheetah than a Devon Rex, outstripping the leggiest of Rex.  Although, I feel that Filly will give her a run for her money in the legs eleven stakes very soon!  SaBreena is a true runner, she is precise and determined to break a world record and pitted against her family of Mother Pearl and Grandma Flaire, their stance is almost identical with only speed to separate them all.  ​

Pearl is a strider and a trotter, stretching out her long body and making the most of a walk in the park.  She has her earbuds in, listening to some good Country and Western and doing a satisfying stroll to it's sultry love songs with the odd out of tune blurt out of 'Pearl's a Singer'. She is the main user of the wheel and can, if pressed run exceptionally fast to the point where if she grips on she can nearly go all the way about before she is catapulted off into space like some furball.  She is a vocal CatWoman with a jagged purpose of fighting anyone who dares to use the treadmill before her. 

Flaire is the slowest of the treadmill trainers and will walk at the most leisurely pace of a slow deliberate walk and thus has time to growl at any passerby that should come within sniffing distance.  She will only walk, painfully slow, to annoy all of us so that her steps last the longest and she can control her sisters, children and grand children in equal amounts.  Her march is one of determined snailism and no one can speed that girl up unless your want a clip around your listening devices!  She is head of the house, queen of all she surveys and should anyone challenge her - she just pees and occasionally poos on the wheel to mark it as her own. 

This week has gone with a bang. The Roblings are nearly eleven weeks old and with their first vaccinations are doing just great.  SaBreena's little joys are all happy in their new homes and there have been lots of photos with doting parents just loving their new babies.  We all just wish the weather was brighter so the Roblings could at least experience the outdoors before they leave home in a months time.  Maybe there might be a little sunshine to come our way soon?  Until then, the Horrace family are donned in rainwear, their tiny wellies splashing about in puddles collecting Momma's very expensive tulip bulbs from the pots. Biting off the flowers and doing a runner with the tasty bit.  I am shocked at their tenacity. Forget rain and hail and eating with the minions, just go straight for the al a carte menu.  I can think of more things than that on my menu - oh Horrace.....come hither and jump into Momma's freeze dry machine will you. I fancy a squirrel snack! 

From the laziest of Queens - Your Queen Vee =^..^=

It has been a whirlwind of entertainment here at Maystar HQ again.  It comes like that, nothing for months, then a total wipeout in two weeks.  On Tuesday the 20th May it began like any morning, Momma arrives in the kitchen to feed us Kitchen Cats and go about her catly duties outside, except, she didn't turn up?  She bypassed the kitchen and left the house before the blackbirds were up, carrying a heavy box of squealing and very H'ANGRY kittens.  We presume, by the smell of the 'vet carrier' under the door, they were headed for the vets?  I guess it would have been a tad cruel to feed the entire household right in front of them as by their screaming they had been starved since early doors, ready for surgeries of the birth control kind. 

The following few days were taken up with Momma and I playing nurse to a rather miserable Donna and Marlee May who had full lady speys - Ouchie, I remember mine.  Rufus Rex fared better with just his pompomectomy and was happy to play with Svein, except Svein called him a eunuch and SaBreena had to separate them.  Much like their Grand Dad Ikon and Father Magnus Rex who also had to be separated after much name calling this week. That all started over CatWomen.  I kept well out of that one and will report later!  

By Thursday, all the Breelings had bounced back and Donna tentatively lay about recovering happily.  Her 'booboo' much more dramatic than her Sisfurrs. She lay, paw on brow, whilst Momma syringed recovery water from a dropper onto her tongue.  Pfft, as soon as Momma was out of earshot, Donna was up - racing about!  You gotta congratulate the kid on an Emmy well received.   Fast forward ten days and Donna was packing her bags and headed off to live with the comedian, Russell Kane, and his family of 2 cats. there is Terry, Roy and Pug Colin and not forgetting a Mini Person too.  She made instagram by nightfall with a training video and copious amounts of fun pictures too. On the Caturday, Rufus and Marlee left for Wiltshire to join two large household cats, Jasper & Lulu, that tower over them.  They are destined for the quiet life, just Mum, Dad and a new sofa to lounge on.  Svein had a more adventurous Sunday and is usually the boldest and bravest of the litter, turned sissy and was beaten up by a young minicat named Rexy in the MINOAN household.  A week on we have reports that they are best of friends already and that Svein is very posh when he meows and purrs like a train.  

We wish the BREELINGS 2021 wonderful new lives with their hand picked families. 

The honeymoon period is over between Ikon and Son Magnus.  We had a wonderful year where they got on great guns providing that Ikon was kept subdued and calm and absolutely no testosterone in his system. Unfortunately, the Neuter-UM chip wore off and he became the aggressor and began to torment Magnus.  Then, one morning it became a battle of wills as neither would step away from a brewing fight.  Having seen the signs before, we all took cover as the snaking wildlings took their weapons in paw, shields up and attack..... Mid flight, Momma caught Ikon but he did a double take and ran at Momma, who grabbed the nearest bin lid and pinned him to the ground where upon Magnus took out a sock filled with rocks and headed full on for the noise under the bin lid which was kicking and screaming under her hands.  Magnus went for a full on all out battle cry, mouth like a gaping banshee and snaking his body sideways.  Momma took up her next weapon, a bamboo cane.  Wow, you should have seen her twirl that thing this way and that to block his advances as she backed further towards the side of the house where there was a bucket of rain water.  She had one foot on the bucking bin lid and was outstretched, waving her cane like a Hollywood jazz act towards the water and splish splashing Magnus with it.  Hating water, Magnus backed down and now bored and wet returned to his side of the garden.  Ikon was mad but confused and was scooped up and swiftly put over the half door of the main House of Fun, very quickly I might add.  Magnus was corralled into Al-CAT-raz to live out his days in solitary.  

So now, there is twice the work, twice the cleaning, twice the cuddling and twice the bowls, the treats, the vitamin pastes, the littertrays (not that they are using those) and twice the stench as they play piddling wars across the garden at each other.  It's a crying shame.  Luckily, ManSlave takes good care of Ikon's needs with manchat in a sweet bromance and Momma tends to Magnus with cuddles and kisses even on his smelly piddle feets!  Faith sometimes visits them and keep them company on runs about the garden and won't stand for any of that boyhood nonsense either.  

It all is taking it's toll on the house dynamics too as often Flaire and Pearl would enjoy girl time in Al-CAT-raz with their own cat wheel and special treats during the day away from the fray of Breelings, Roblings and their prospective Mothers. Never mind.  It can't be helped.  The house is just a bit on edge and it all takes it toll on all things . Health, happiness and kindness to each other.  It's kill or be killed. End of!

Your, keeping my head low, Queen Vee =^..^=

You never really know who will make the first break for it out of the miniest of MiniCats.  But, I can tell you, when I saw it, I nearly couldn't believe my peepers.  There was Duke, the most chillaxed of the Roblings, mounting a scaled detail out of the kitten pen.  His crampons set to stealth mode.  With a bit of scrabbling here and timed launching jumps, he scaled the un-scaleable slippery walls of the enclosure and landed square on the bench.  From there, he teetered on the edge like a lone lemming and then parachuted off the perimeter to the open ground and made a mad 'loo brush' tail dash for cover.  Never in all my days have I seen such a feat at such a young age.  He then went on to squeeze back into the kitten pen, opening a gap whereupon letting his fellow troupes out from the boundary fence line and all four made a break for it, out onto the landing.  Their cover was blown by Filly's trilling and much thwakking of her fury paw in the hallway!  Note, I did not raise the alarm - snitches gets gets stitches!!

Robyn was there in a flash, trying to round up the four escape artists and it was like a scene from the 'Laughing Policeman'.  Kittens rolling everywhere in hysterical laughter at being caught.  I swear they have been on the gas 'n' air!!! Poor Robyn was distraught at trying to shoo them back towards the safety of the kitten pen whilst all the other Mothers laughed at her from the side lines giving their ten pence worth of support.  She was non-plussed by their chants and a few got a fist full of fivers to take away with them.  Me, I said nothing.  I was like a cat caught watching ants run back and forth on a summers day. Quite content with my lot sat out of the way, however, I did take umbrage at Filly clouting Duke and gave her a swipe as she passed by, there are rules and she is not a follower! Heck, everyone loves a drama, but not everyone wants to be in it!

Momma soon had everyone sorted with kitten pen extended, barricaded and filled with so many toys they forgot about escaping again. I remember my days as a teeny dot.  I was forever breaking free and racing about Momma's office because my Mother, Gracie, used to dump me out of the nest into the litter tray, so I lived with Momma in a small basket by her desk.  That didn't last long.  FREEDOM!   I remember when Robyn was tiny, she climbed the walls of the kitten basket at just two weeks old. Being hand fed made her very excitable too. I think it's something in that milky rice Momma feeds us?  Gives you jazz feets, the type that don't stop tapping!

Pearl is the biggest escapologist in the family, she can sneak out of most things and especially over fences, luckily, she always comes back when called with a sulky look on her face.  Faith is smart at escaping from a cat carrier. She HATES travelling in one, too many vet visits.  She is a dab paw at unzipping the zippers and has to have hers tied up or locked.  Momma brought a new crate for her to travel in because she is super sneaky!  Ikon made good his escape last week when he saw Pearl squeeze through the communal fence into the big garden beyond.  He did the exact same move but got his head stuck. He couldn't go forwards nor backwards so ManSlave had to rescue him.  Magnus Rex is not into such simple escapes, he likes a wilder freedom and can jump square onto the shed roof and tootle along the ridge, slip slides on the plastic roof, up to the apex and along the sky bridge to the flat roof and from there he can watch the neighbours in their hot tub! 

Filly can climb anything, can run faster than anyone and doesn't listen or come back.  She is a foot dodger, a shoulder surfer and all round wild beast.  Nothing can contain her and she doesn't like rules.  Maybe as she grows she might calm down?  I am guessing not!  We are dreading her kittens antics!  SaBreena is a cool chick. She can pick a lock with a single claw and scale the highest doors.  her escapes are more sedate and as not to draw attention.  Lillibet has never escaped anywhere or anything. She is too good.  Takes a leaf out of my book.  We were dragged up proper you see. Flaire is a queen and above anyone else, she only has eyes for ManSlave. She would simply await her golden chariot, board it and leave with a parade of well trained mice pulling it. 

That's all for this weekend.  With love and joy in our hearts from your Queen Vee =^..^=

You know, you can't get the staff around here!  Momma was laid up for an entire week with her titanium spine ache and had to take so many drugs that she could barely type her name, let alone write my blog with me. Ah well, I got the privilege of snoozing in bed with her and huffed at anyone who came near.  She let me sleep under her knees sometimes until she drifted into a drugged sleep and squashed me, sending me flying out of the floofy blankie quick smart. 

Occasionally, I allowed the kittens into the bed with us where upon I could keep them at a distance with a stare or a small snort. You see, I happened to eat some of the kittens fish one lunch time and had a breathing attack again after a rash broke out all over me. Luckily, ManSlave has those special pills to reduce allergies and I was breathing again and looked less like a fuzzy lobster.  So I was also playing 'sicky' in bed.  Well, that's my excuse!

I missed telling you about the Easter photo shoot of the Breelings and just how funny they were being put into a basket, which was surrounded by colourful balls and eggs, none of which made it into the final photos.  They had beaten up every shiny thing, spilling the toys and eggs all over the floor.  Momma placed a kitten in a basket and got the camera ready and zoom, gone... She got the camera ready and put the kitten in the basket, nope, zoom, gone.... She had to hold the camera in the end and try to focus on a kitten and again, zoom, gone.... This was not going well this week, they were too hyper.  She had Donna hanging from her jeans, Rufus jumping for the waggle toys, Marlee yelling her head off with frustration of not getting the toys and Svein launching himself onto anything that would take his weight, including the curtains and the lighting boom.  Crash!  Out of 100's of images, there were 4 possible ones and Svein's were STILL blurred despite him having the most shots taken of him. 

I also missed telling you about Marlee May & Rufus Rex's parents visiting and how dinky they found us all.  The Mr said that Magnus was small. Well, Magnus took offence at that and tried to puff himself up into a giant cat, but soon deflated on the Mrs lap for a cuddle.  He showed them his pompoms and Ikon flirted with them running on his wheel and tried to butch up his muscles to look extra hench.  Nope, the Mr said that they were small compared to their Top Cat at home.  Me thinks he must be one of those mainecoon jobbies as they have pompoms the same size as Magnus & Ikon ::now imagining tiny Magnus & Ikon on back end of another cats butt::
Then, they saw all those little minicats and the oohs and aghhhhs soon came out with how dinky they were.  Rufus Rex thought that was silly because he is a great big lump of a boy and despite his initial 'don't look at me I am not here' he too puffed himself up and showed off his sleek long structure and that he was going to outgrow his Daddy!  Marlee doesn't care for that, she likes being a tiny dinky thing and is proud of her svelte figure.  These millenials, surprised she isn't vegan - oh hells bells - can I even say she anymore? 

With Momma stuck in bed, ManSlave had to help out in the cat department and he did an OK job.  It really brings to light that Momma needs to label the new food canisters to the feeders as they got a bit mixed up and I got chicken diet food which made me scratch, Faith and Lillibet got Filly's full fat food, Filly got my Rabbit food and now won't eat her full fat one.  Ooops.  Faith put on 100g in 3 days! She ballooned and floated past Momma on the landing one afternoon and I threw up at her feet and it was then she spotted the problem. My food is not little triangles but small flowers.so Momma went downstairs on her butt and sorted out the problem and put an end to the free for all.  Filly was most put out and now hovers at my food machine hoping to grab a bite.  I give her a short sharp slap and she growls at me. Pfft, you don't scare me young-un, I invented growling!   

Yesterday, Donna had a visit from her new family.  She did really well as did SaBreena who had never seen a mini-person before.  Donna took just a short time to come out and meet her doting family and was soon playing and being cuddled and kissed by them.  I don't like mini-people unless I am at a show and I am looking down on them.  It's a shame as I can be lots of fun and give everyone else confidence.  It was good in a way though as these babies are going to busy homes and won' have me there to hold their paws.  They have all been very forward in this litter and are downstairs for most of the day racing about together with Filly's help.  It will be pick uop time soon for the Breelings after their neutering and final vaccines.  Yikes, then those Roblings will be out and about creating havoc and them being my Great Grand kits they will be C R A Z Y!!!

So, last weekend, you all missed the amazing spring lamb lunch of which we all got a nibble as a treat and now, this weekend, I have the smell of free range pork defrosting in the microwave ready for the oven later today.  There will be no pork for us cats, apparently, it can carry worms and creepy crawlies that upset our tummies, so we shall wait for it to cook and try and swipe a slice or two providing ManSlave doesn't dress it in that smelly sage stuff!!!

I am off to supervise and make sure he knows what he is doing - we don't want a mix up like he did with our food.  Momma would never forgive him for getting the Sunday Roast mixed p with a bowl of cereal!!

​With love from your all wise Queen Vee =^..^=

There are copious amounts of packet food vanishing into the kitten room and you all thought it was a world shortage due to the Suez canal being closed and the influx of new critters needing more packets, but no, I can honestly tell you that it is Maystar HQ that is draining the resources for the rest of the world.  Robyn eats them with gay abandon each day and it is her that is running the universe low on those delicious shiny packets of delight.

I have a parchante for those slippery packs of goodness and at any point can be found thieving them from under Momma's nose.  Occasionally, Momma leaves one in the sink to be rinsed out and I steal it and chew holes enough to make a good sieve.  Then, if I am not lucky enough to get one of those, they are rinsed out and put into the peddle bin in the bathroom.  I have purrfected the art of trickery thievery and use sweet Svein to balance on the peddle of the bin whilst I scout about, head in, among the packs, trying to grab one like some sort of fairground game.  Once, Svein jumped off the peddle and the lid came down and hit me square between the ears.  I staggered about a bit holding aloft the well fought tuna packet that I was NOT going to let go of easily.  I reeled back and forth with dizzying staggers, swaying here and there and my prize was scooped up and a quick kiss on my head from Momma - like THAT'S going to make it all better...Herrumpf.. ::gives low growl and a hiss:: 

I can now go one step further and retrieve, not only empty washed packets, but full ones.  It takes a bit of ingenuity and skill and I am always up for a challenge if the reward is ample.  The packets are decanted into a plastic airtight box with clips and then placed in a draw, one of those easy break in one Ikea types for kids.  The items in question are locked away quite well so I do have to use the shingle in my head to work it out.  However, I am a smart arse and a few times watching closely and I can break in by pushing the draw above backwards to reveal the draw below and IF Momma has left the clip off to the container, I can flip open the lid, sneak in a paw and hook me out a fresh one.  Gosh I am just so devious and smart and decidedly clever.  What would I do if I had thumbs?

Not every reward is met with a happy ending.  There I am chewing the guts out of a full packet, spilling it's stomach contents onto the carpet and ripping open it's middle and devouring what I can before the hand of hell comes and takes it away, usually with a smart tap on the butt and a cry of "Oh Viktori, just why?" from Momma's lips.  I lick mine, over and over tasting the last of a hard won prize and grab out with my claws and teeth in a snapping motion to get back my packet.  I get leverage only to be shaken loose from my win and watch as the last of it's innards are poured into Robyn's dish, the door shut, never to be seen again.  The hardships I have to deal with are too much for my cat brain and I explode in a dance of semi silliness, which belies my true feelings of upset and despise and I dance and dance and thwak a kitten or two as I pass.  There, that feels better.  The world is balanced again. 

Today, I can not pull my mind from the Charolais beef that lays in the microwave, rising to room temperature.  I have pressed my sniffer to the door several times to make sure it does not suffocate in there. It's ok, I can hear mooing or it could be Lillibets gentle snore?  I do wonder if there will be a smidgen for me as all the thieving has created a rash on my skin and I am to have a bath later to sooth it.  What would sooth it better is slices of beef laid across my tummy whilst I wallow in a bath of packets complete with turkey escalopes over my eyes and tartare face pack.  Then, I believe, I would feel so healthy and in my element. 

Here is to pamper Sunday.  Huzzah!
Your delicious Queen Vee =^..^=

​

I have to complain about the scribe in no uncertain terms.  She was PANTS 'Probably And Not Totally Sane' at time of 'saving' my hard won wording.  Pfft, two weeks running she fell asleep at the wheel and lost two blogs into the ether!  What has Momma got to sleep for anyway?  She has us to look after and we deserve better than a kippy Mother with only half of her brain on us whilst the other half sleeps and I don't mean ManSlave in that! 

Now, two weeks ago seems like a ridiculously long period of time and I can hardly remember what I had for brekki, let alone a full fourteen days ago?   I mean, I have slept since then and seemingly, so has Momma in fits and starts as there were some more Maystarlings born here at HQ, I remember that much as we were all neglected and I vaguely remember being starved and then I passed out....  Robyn, the watermelon, Rankin finally let go of her fascinatingly fantastical fruit and podded eight mighty babies ranging from a meer 40g to 88g.  Some were born here and some at the vets.  You wouldn't imagine the tremendous mess she made, fruit juice, pith and seeds just everywhere - they don't call them watermelons for nothing!  

The sounds coming from the kitten room were just terrible.  There was screaming from Robyn, soothing words from Momma, crying from ManSlave and none of it was joyful.  I wasn't sure who was soothing who as I pressed my face to the catflap window and saw watermelon juice coming from not only Robyn but ManSlave too?  It was a bit like a scene from Amityville Horror.  Robyn levitating, wait, that wasn't levitating, that was Robyn attached to ManSlave's hand at the sharp end whilst Momma had at the soggy end and a hold on Robyn like a bowling ball to dislodge a stuck kitten that was also levitating in unison.  I had to blink twice as all four did several passes around the kitten room in what can only be described as a tango in a blood bath whilst Robyn sang the final notes of 'Pussini's*' Madame Butterfly.  I rubbed my eyes and looked again as I couldn't see where ManSlave began and Momma ended with Robyn in between - visions of The Human / Cat/Human Centepede flashed through my mind and I just can not unsee it!

All of that 'mess' culminated in poor Robyn being whisked off to the vets after a few hours rest as there was still a quantity of my Great GrandKits in her tummy and no amount of help from the vets could get them out either so the dreaded C-section was done and Robyn came home sore, empty, milkless and very upset indeed.  Momma was unimpressed with having to hand feed one of the only litters born at Maystar HQ that actually didn't need hand feeding due to correct blood match!  Life sucks sometimes. Us kitchen cats also heard that not all those bambinos made it and Aunt Liza visited to help Momma dig a hole and bury the wee souls outside with TomFun, King Slinky and the rest of the baby Maystarlings. 

For me, I find it particularly sad as nasty things happened to me when I gave birth to Tyga and when Tyga gave birth to Robyn too.  It has been a long hard road for my unique line that will end with Robyn.  It is just not meant to be. I can hold my head up high, I have left a little of me out there in the big wide world to make lots of families super happy.  Although, I do make the best babies and have the best GrandKits and now Great GrandKits that are totally unique, funny and quirky like me! God Save the Queen!

Rather than mess this blog up, Momma has said she won't scribe much longer as her eyelids are heavy from looking after sweet Marley May and ManSlave.  ManSlave had a dodgy Covid jab reaction and Marlee May had an operation on her tummy where SaBreena was a little zealous with her first and second born girls and bit holes in them.  She got a bit carried away with placenta eating resulting in tubes of tummy popped out..  Oh my, only happen to us.  Marlee is 8 weeks old this week and managed really well and has been a little angel except her bouncy recovery where she damaged her newly made zipper.  Pfft.  Why do kits these days have a short attention spans?  In my day, Mother's could give us kids a sharp claw about the legs and we would sit still for hours not wanting another to match on the other leg.  It's all about ADHD, spectrums and stuff like that now.  In my day, you were just plain naughty and you were respectful to your Mother Queen, end of.  Anyhoo, Marlee has been dragged up 'proper' and one look from Aunt Robyn and she soon behaved herself and Robyn rewarded her with a kiss and wash.  Her Mother, SaBreena, was out tarting herself to Flaire in the lounge who was riding her up and down like a small jockey at Hicksetad.  Well, who doesn't like a bit of girl on girl action?  It's all the rage here!

When we are all not making bets on who will pass the winning post on the lounge carpet, we do have the Roast to concentrate on and today is a shoulder of my fave, little Larry the Lamb.  It is to be slow cooked in spice so Lillibet and I are headed down now to sit and wait for the dribs and drabs we might get as the fat is trimmed.  Waste not want not and let me tell you my waist wants!! Once we have what we desire, I may go and rest my head on ManSlave's chair and make him sit on the floor.  He is in my bad books for not fixing the oven light or finding out why it keeps blowing up?  So maybe if I sit in his warm leather seat, he may fix it and I can take up oven bathing again as his reward. 

Must dash.... I hear the fridge opening!

To infinity and beyond - Your Queen of the Blog  

*Puccini's it was a play on words before I get complaints!!

The days are getting longer and brighter, warmer and sunnier.  The great Orb wakes in the east at six something and shines right into my window where I sleep.  It does mean that I am the very first one to see Horrible Horrace out collecting his rations that he stored over winter.  Wait, I lie, he is eating all the bird seed and has forgotten where he cashed all that slate he stole.  Or has he found all that slate and is now wondering what the heck slate is doing where he thought he had cashed his nuts.  ::Horrace checks nuts - he has two - scratches his head - bounds off:: 

With the sun so bright red, it comes with the shepherds warning of the day to come and by the time that great Orb reaches it's summit at midday, then the trill of CatWomen ensues and the leader of the gang this week is none other than Filly.  She is a mere five months old and presenting her booty to Magnus and Ikon in the fashion of the best Salsa dancers out there.  She starts with her basic 'tredding' step, then works her way right up to a backwards cha cha cha, parking her giggling buttocks to the wire of the CatPod in the hope that one of those boys will take her paw and not let her solo too long.  They both trip over themselves and at one point, Magnus got so frenzied he even tried dried humping his Dad and that didn't go down well, it was received with a great punch on the nose after he wriggled free.

Due to the amount of dancing taking place, the Sky Bridge is out of bounds now, you could say, Momma has put them all on a 'Cuban break'!  The boys haven't been inside the kitchen for a full week due to Ikon using the cupboard doors as his own personal litter tray.  However, due to the warmer weather, they have both had so much time outside to tire them out until Magnus ruined that by jumping on the roof of the House of Fun, trotting along it and then sitting just out of reach.  That's OK, there are more than one ways to 'skin a cat' and a few games of dragging sticks about the place with bits of string on resulted in a curious Magnus jumping down.  "Catch more Magnuses with honey." Momma tells Ikon.  He hates being ignored and it doesn't take him long to stop sulking and join in. 

The Breelings, too, have benefited from more Orb light and are awake earlier and longer, using the daylight hours to race about and learn new things.  They are all getting bigger and finding their paws with a daypen which is triple the size of the one they were born in.  It has lots of toys and scratch posts with places to hide, jump and climb giving them healthy muscles and great strength.  They have enough room currently to be near a litter tray but long enough to scuttle at high speed and chase each other.  SaBreena has been an excellent Mother keeping them spotlessly clean, much to their dismay.  Who wants to be held down and washed when you could be hooning up and down?  They scream, protest and stamp their tiny paws.  They will thank her when they are old enough to really look after themselves.  Nothing worse than grubby white socks on a school day.  I had me a little visit yesterday to see what all the fuss was about and OK, I relent, they are kinda cute and as a Great Aunt, I have to commend SaBreena, they are a credit to her!  

In the late afternoons now, as the Orb light moves from window to window, there are cats seemingly creeping from the woodwork to lay in pools of liquid molten.  We follow the patch on the stairs and argue if we should touch.  A growl here, a moan there. Companionship of a sort just so we can share a 2ft space of warmth.  The light trails around to the west 'wing' and is just filling the front bedroom with enough light to lay four of us in a row along the pillows.  It is a tight squeeze and you have to give up your Orb spot on the landing early to get first dibs at the fading light, but it's worth it.  Queen of the castle and all that!   So as the light fades, we can only hope that she graces with her gift of renewed life tomorrow and head to the back of the house to watch the Full Moon rise in the East.  Up she goes, cold and bright and rejuvenating as I doze the evening away in her whiteness, recharging my internal batteries.  

Our days are unchanging currently and we were looking forward to the weekend and playtime, but the Parentals worked away from home on some property close by.  It can't have been far, they didn't take the car.  Or maybe that's because it came back home on the back of a tow truck and that's typical as ManSlaves car is already at the menders.  I have especially missed Momma and each afternoon bagsied a cuddle before anyone else, deeply purring as she sings to me and rubs my head, planting the odd warm kiss between my ears, I purr louder and press my head into her face with a hard bang, I know she loves it because it makes her cry.  Faith said it wasn't crying it was eye smarting as humans have delicate proboscis.  Who cares, she loves me and that's all that matters!

The Orb is here again, bright and early.  Filly is trilling and setting of the backing singers, Flaire and Pearl off.  They have talked into the early hours about starting up as a trio, Destiny's Child, eat your heart out!  For me, I shall go solo and accompany ManSlave in his single quest of the purrfect Roast.  It will start cooking really soon and have us all salivating by lunch time.  Those acapella singers might even hush their mouths if they are filling them?  Who knows? We can but try!

Your loyal Queen Vee =^..^=
​

On Monday, Momma made changes to the kitten pen, designing and creating a removable door within a door that houses a microchip catflap.  Us big girls helped out loads by poking about in the box of screws and standing on the bits to be sawn off as well and Filly running off with the chuck thingie that changes drill bits, staring at Momma and said "Go on, dare me!" as she kicked it far under the fridge freezer.  "Filly" Momma shouted and off she hurled around the kitchen knocking our box of screws all over the floor - more fun "screw you Momma"!  With that job finally done it was time to sweep up the sawdust and we helped by running through the dust at the last second as it was about to be swept into the dustpan and Filly being way too big now to ride in the pan, broke the dust tray and running off with the rubber strip that makes the sweepings go in so easily.  Momma had to get the vacuum out, which woke Robyn from her pregnant slumber and she moaned unequivocally.

On Tuesday, Pearl had to go to the Vet to have a scan and Cystocentesis, a procedure to remove urine from the bladder with a needle.  She was in really early and by afternoon there was a call to say it was all successful and she was so well behaved that there was no sedation required as she laid down as Momma had been teaching her all the previous week so it wasn't so scary and Vet Maddie said she was an amazing pretty girl who purred all day with everyone one and rode on her shoulders.  Momma felt so very proud of her because a few years back she was scared very baddly at a show and she was never the same with anyone ever again.  The tests results came back on Thursday that there was no infection, just some sludge so she was to continue on the diet I had a few months back and all the pills and pain killers and already she is improving and we are all playing with toys together so we know she feels much brighter again and she is living up to her name of Purrrly.  The vet has given her the all clear for vaccinations in a few weeks time and hopefully another litter in late Spring as they feel it is all hormonal  and better to get her less stressed.  Just in time we hope as Ikon is showing some prowess.

Onto Wednesday and the rest of the week where the Breelings are growing and I was allowed in to see them briefly on the bed.  SaBreena let me sit on a scratch post as observe, she just kept one eye open and trained on me in case I pinched one.  I wouldn't do that, they taste funny at this age and smell like a mini goat herd.  Momma looked after mine for me, I was spoilt!  Robyn is getting on my nerves, I don't know why I feel such animosity towards her currently? maybe I am a little bit green eyed monster as she has taken my space in Momma's bed.  Hmm, I will think on it.  She is my only GrandCat and I loved playing with her when she was little and now she has turned into a fat feline football and ripe for fighting with.  Robyn's nickname of Mariarchi has her remembering her own kittenhood and she is belting between kitten room and bathroom playing the Mariarchi band tune and tipping her sombrero as she scuttles in front of Momma all purposeful and full of self importance.  She just makes me want to trip her up.  Today, she looks like one of those cartoon characters "If animals were round".  Go on, look them up - she is so like that, bumping into stuff and getting stuck and unable to jump.  It is a job not to sit there sniggering at her.  Momma caught me an clipped my lughole.  Not my fault she is comical trying to wash her backside.

Ikon is another comical character, although, he is still on my hate list.  ManSlave threatens me with a visit to 'The House Of Fun' if I don't stop chasing Robyn around and pasting her.  He reminds me how I feel when Ikon pastes me.  It's every cat for themselves here you know. Look after numero uno right? Momma says not, it's share or be eaten!  OMC, I might be the next Sunday Lunch? Cat-O-Van, Fee-Lime Pie or worst still some Calalonian dish.  Yikes, I had better be good from now on as Cat-Line are on furrlough and don't care anymore so I have no outlet for complaint.  I would, however, like to put in my own complaint that if I am to be Sunday lunch that the darn oven light is on the blink again and this is the second bulb to enter it's depths and the third to blow in as many weeks.  Those People at Neff are gonna get a taste of my thunderpaw if they don't sort out this crucial bit of kit so I can see, um wait, myself cooking.... on second thoughts, keep your light, I am out of here before I become dinner!

I would also like to complain too at the amount of food that is being carried upstairs and never to return.  I just do not quite know where it is all going?  Well, except the furry slugs that SaBreena made are now filling their hollow leggies and she is looking thinner and thinner, despite sniffing tin full after tin full of duck parfait and rabbit roulade.  So, now there is goats milky being mixed up and bags of rabbit mixture and vitamins and this and that heading into that room and never to return and what do I get? NUFFIN.  Now, Pearl is getting something at lunchtime to aid her water intake and so is Flaire to bring her to breeding condition. Pfft.  They nip to the bathroom at 'their' feeding time for a spoonful of ducky mixed to a fine liquid like a duck gazpacho.   What do I get....NUFFIN!  I am getting fed up with NUFFIN so I sit close to Filly in the morning and lick a few bit of bunny from her dishy and right behind me now is Faith and behind her Lillibet.  None of us dare move or lose our place and that Filly is tough and growls at us all.  Us three NUFFIN cats are fading away don't you know.  Last Sunday with that amazing bit of lamb - I got NUFFIN then too. 

Back to Ikon, he will go into the vets for his vaccine soon and he will get his eye checked too and we hope a final sign off for the damage he did flying from the cat wheel into the door.  He is on steroid drops every 3rd day now until his check up.  He is also feeling the joys of Spring and is beginning to take notice of more than just Horrible Horraces.  Flaire and Pearl have been parading in the warm weather and so has a rival garden cat or two from the local area.  He is very dapper and quiet compared to his screaming son who sounds like a strangled peacock every morning yelling 'the song of his people' to the neighbourhood and all the felines within a mile radius.  His mind is on chicks and I don't mean the feathered variety!  Ikon is more of a gent, well, OK, a lazy love sausage, and doesn't have to yell and scream to get the ladies. He can still entice me over, with his good looks, then I remember the belting he will give me and he can pee for Poland to draw them in with his stinky scent.  Yuck. It's enough to make a NUFFIN cat gag... Mmm let Flaire and Pearl deal with those pheromones!!

The highlight of the week was a delivery from Crystal Clear Pet Products with two new zippy beds and a ton of toys that the Lovell's carefully chose to match our cat houses and Momma's kitchen.  The box is huge and even though it's recycle week, it's a keeper fur sure.  OK, I am off to check on lunch... wait, what is this rubbish? Pre-cooked pork slices and boiled spuds?  No oven to peer into? Well, that's ruined my entire weekend.   Pfft not only a NUFFIN cat but a NUFFIN NUFFIN.  Sigh. Herrumph.

Your loyalist of Queen Vee's (well THE ONLY QUEEN VEE!) =^..^=   

It has been so very cold here and all the Horraces have been out in force as well as copious amounts of all sorts of birds which have been excellent fun to watch as the odd bit of winter sun warms our bodies on the windowsills where we look from. It is bird watching for fair weather cats. I can honestly say that Magnus and especially Ikon have taken it to a new level and are out every morning for a good half hour in minus five degrees running back and forth trying to keep warm.  Their coats are luxuriously thick now.  Magnus didn't like the ice much at first, but as the week wore on, he warmed to it - although, his yelling has grown in velocity and I am not sure if it's the freezing temperatures on his paws or his nuts he is shouting about?

Ikon had an unfortunate slip and slide in an empty litter tray, well, I say empty...It was in fact full of ice.  He insisted on balancing on it to greet Filly at the wire and every time he bounced heavily onto it's surface and then, splosh, his paws melted through and in he fell, I was in the kitchen window holding my belly and a paw over my mouth to stifle a laugh, it was very funny.  Momma was on hand to dry his paws and give him cuddles and some vitamin paste as a reward.  He is such a good boy now with his feet being dried.   He is also super good at his eye drops, which are still going, but not much longer now, just a few days.  Momma calls him, puts a treat in his bed by the window, he munches that and purrs, then Momma tilts his head back and administers the drops, he them wolfs down the extra treat for that and purrs some more, then he skips over to the darker side of the cat house, usually on three feet, as it is a very exciting thing to happen, and he gets his eye checked with a pen light and another treat, then a game of chase the light.  What a star, even if he is my worst enemy, I have to admit, he is a good boy. 

I have to take my meds daily too but mine taste vile and I see Momma filling the syringe and I walk about flicking my licker around in anticipation. YUCK, here it comes, I hunker down in my radiator bed, pretending not to be seen and I get the dose anyway.  Takes a good few minutes to get that taste from my mouth and then I am ready for a treat and a little raw rabbit for my brekki.  Pearl had a visit to the vet AGAIN for her bladder and she too has a similar medicine routine in the mornings.  Then on Tuesday, she will go in for a whole day to be scanned, stabbed with neeguls and the discrace of a furrmometer all that just to get some urine out.  I feel bad for her, she can only pee a teeny bit at a time and was crying whilst passing a 5p sized one. Luckily the drugs are making her feel very happy again and she was playing with me today in the lounge.  It's nice to have her back inside, we do get on OK at times when she isn't on one!. 

Robyn is as fat as 'oot and can hardly jump onto any surface.  She just rolls from room to room like a weeble and falling asleep in random places.  She is such an active cat usually that the house feels very quiet and annoyingly, she has taken to thwakking me back if I corner her and has a ferocious growl.  She is no fun anymore.  Pfft. She met up with Magnus the other morning in the kitchen by accident and she spat at him "You got me like this, I HATE you."  It was strong words for the kitten headed boy and he went off sobbing his heart out that his best girlfriend now holds him solely responsible for getting her 'up the duff' and will be coming after him for kitsupport payments and for the first time he was having to look into getting a better job than Horrace watching. His Dad was there to comfort him, "Girls aren't everything Son."

SaBreena's Breelings have reached the escapee stage and various trials of escaping kittens has ensued.  I watched through the catflap as one tootled about over the special dividers meant to keep three week old kittens in place and I did have me a giggle watching them escape.  SaBreena was worried sick and woke Momma at 5am to rescue one of them.  There are also new noises coming out of the kitten pod, trilling and squeaking from SaBreena, who has never said two words to anyone since she was born, who knew she had a voice for such delicate conversations? She uses this quiet and subtle chatting to entice babies here and there for the milky bar.  She has become quite the sweet chatter and purrs all the time for Momma as well as pirriping welcomes. She seems genuinely very happy with her lot at the moment.  

If you don't already know it, it is Valentines day today and that means lots of love to send to everyone. ​Being Valentines, it is the oven light I am in love with and after it's dramatic 'bye your leave' over the last few weeks, I am holding out for an illuminating experience.  I shall sit avidly and hope that my sweet lady love, (yes, that's right, I prefer girls) lights up my life and makes me goosy with delight as she shines her soft glow upon my face. Oh, OK, you got me, all I am after is the half leg of Agnus that lays in wait for my eyes to feast upon, forget the light, she is fickle!  Oh and Agnus isn't the name of the lamn btw, it's latin don't you know and I iz well educated in I! 

Love, peace and oven lights to all of your hearts this special day. 
​Your Queen Vee =^..^=

I know, I know, I skipped a blog last week.  There was a good reason, honestly!  Momma had, on the Caturday, taken Lillibet to her new home and settled her in and we all thought it was going to be wonderful. She did everything right, sleeping on Lillian's bed and then on the Sunday sitting on her knee to watch some TV in front of the fire. But sadly, Lillian wanted a bit of a fuzzier kitty than Lillibet, who's coat is very harsh at the moment with her over grooming.  So, on Sunday, Momma collected her and brought her home. She was none the worse for wear and had a lovely stay over with Lillian who was an excellent host.  So, because of that, I wasn't allowed to blog on my own and thus, no blog!  Pfft - can't get the staff.

This week has been busy each day with me pasting Robyn quite a bit. I enjoy seeing her face all screwed up into a hiss when I belt her one.  ManSlave told me off good and proper explaining she was pregnant.  Herrumph, so  what?  These pregnant girls are getting ALL the attention and I am getting none.  I now have to bunk up with Faith at teatime to get cuddles on the recliner with Momma. We don't do sharezeez very well in this house. There is much huffing and puffing.   The Parentals have been out everyday painting out a tenant house. Luckily, it's not far away and they pop back for lunch, then Momma works in the office and I get time then where I bagsy the heated pipes under the floor in there as my spot. Lillibet and Filly reluctantly share a teddy fleece. 

This popping back at lunch provides sustenance for SaBreena and Robyn.  One feeding their mini pride the other growing a mini pride.  Robyn was scanned on Thursday and it looks like a possible set of quads again!  Of course, we are always cautious and don't count our chickens, it just allows us to check if they are all well and wriggly at this point.  She is really full and walks about complaining of trapped wind and with a meow she also lets out the odd burp!  Well, she is only a little cat and we are not quite sure where she is storing them all.  Her belly is so stretched and with a month to go she may even pop like a Mogwai! Robyn is now sleeping in with Momma at night time and SaBreena isn't worried by that at all.  Seriously can not believe how chilled she is, especially having a stress head as a Mother in Pearl!

SaBreena's mini Breelings have gone from butterbeans to rolling about on their backs, waving paws in the air and much less squeaking.  They can now peer over the side of the kitten pod with their peepers all blacky blue and watery and see the world in front of their sniffers for the first time.  Little more time in the dark to keep those eyes from any damage.  SaBreena announced this morning that they are moving about a bit too much and actually spoke to Momma and kept dashing to the kitten pen where there lay a fat white blob pirruping away on the blankie.  Little soul had fallen out of the nest.  SaBreena is a really good Mum, not like my own who basically ate me every time I dared move. It won't be long before they all tumble out like baby birds waiting to fly. Heaven help us!  Momma popped the baby back in the nest and SaBreena squeezed in and fed them.

One other thing happened last week to give us all a bit of a shake up.  Momma poisoned five of the pride! She was very distraught and another reason why the blog went awry.  On Monday (two weeks go), Momma fed Pearl, Flaire, Ikon, Magnus and Filly a whole large slice of raw turkey.  Not sure why I didn't fancy any? By Wednesday it was like a scene from the living dead, cats spewing and pooing everywhere.  They were separated immediately and Momma knew it was the turkey as no one else had come down with it.  Phew, I can't believe I missed out on that one? I usually LOVE raw turkey!  Momma was worried about everyone so she immediately scooped da poops and they were rushed to labs and sure enough they came back with non other than campylobacter.  I mean WTF right?  It was a little disbelief and worry with upset and stress as the VERY last thing we needed getting to the babies or the pregnant Robyn was that.  

After the results, the vet issued antibiotics and a ton of Forteflora and now ten days later, they are now back to normal and doing correct chocolate gold again.  There is much less washing and luckily, Pearl and Flaire were already out in Al-CAT-raz and Ikon and Magnus in the House of Fun so that was easily contained.  Filly is as tough as old boots and only had a mild dose of it and was 'off' for about two days.   She seemed to just shake it away but had the nasty antibiotics any way.  No one liked them. Pearl and Flaire were angels.  Filly was a brat, Magnus got 'used to it' and Ikon was having none of it. Momma soon had everyone sorted in a fancy routine that took up best part of an hour each morning as Ikon still is having steroid eye drops for the damage he did flying off the wheel and headbutting the door.  Pearl has been treated for her bladder issue which has seemingly cleared with the antibiotics for the bug and everyone else was forced to have vitamin paste.  Plus the scrubbing of the trays each day, all surfaces, walls wiped twice a day and bedding changed and steralised.  Well, you want to stop something spreading, you have to do all these things. I just laid and watched her run back and forth.....YAWN. 

Sometimes you just have to sit back, take a deep breath, have a cat snack and take stock of everything that goes on in a cat household.  It is a source of worry and frustration and stress plays a huge part in our lifestyle.  And with stress comes all the added extra little bouts off illness here and there.  Sigh, at least my bladder is behaving and my skin.  I am still on 0.1mg of Atopica a day and with a mixed diet and some theft of bowl licking from the wet food the preggers ones get, I am very fit and healthy and quite svelte and my coat is lush and plush.  There is always something to laugh about too and we are always trying to be funny and quirky to get attention even if the mood is heavy in the house.  Filly has been a great deflector of upset and swings around shoulders and purringly giving magical cuddles.  She is great for a play about too and always up for a good game, except her playmate, Robyn, is too fat with children!  

Well, that is our news for this week.  It is a flurry of this and that.  I hear ManSlave is back from hunting a gallus gallus domesticus and has let the boys in for the first time in two weeks and Magnus Rex is yelling his merry head off for any girl that will listen.  He is SO loud I feel in the summer he might get an ASBO!  The fact they are in the kitchen is a bit irksome as I do like to see the Sunday Roast doing it's thing and today it's chicken (incase you didn't guess?), except the darn oven light is broken and I am back to peering into it's depths to see the process.  It's not very good seeing as the beast is brand new and not a month has passed and the light has failed, not once but twice, with a new bulb each time.  I shall be ringing CatLine as Neff were not interested in such trivia, but seriously, how is a cat to cope with an unlit lunch? I can only imagine whats going on again and I feel bereft of the cooking action. 

Seeing as the kitchen door is tightly shut, I shall finish this blog then help Momma sew the last of the cat blankets for the outdoorsie ones.  They get all the good stuff out there.  Maybe if I am a really good helpy helper, I might get a new bed too? 

Lots of love my furry followers and until next week 
Your Queen Vee =^..^=

It has been a spectacular week here at Maystar HQ.  Unlike last week, there has been a plethora of activity.  Firstly, let me start by announcing the birth of four spectacularly multicoloured bundles of joy, born to SaBreena and Magnus.  SaBreena showed amazing bravery delivering them and Momma really didn't have to do much.  It all started, right on the due date of Tuesday.  Momma was baking a cake and chatting to her pals so much so that she forgot to add fat to the cake and ruined it... doh!  SaBreena was following Momma everywhere, hanging on her every word and then she disappeared for twenty minutes and no one could find her.  ManSlave searched everywhere and Momma searched behind him.  Then, she spotted that the bottom of the barrel climber was blocked with a blankie and there, inside, pushing her little heart out was SaBreena.  Momma got nibbled and growled at. That's great instinct of don't touch me THIS HURTS!  Momma washed her hands thoroughly, scrubbing under her nails to make sure all was sterile as possible whilst ManSlave lifted SaBreena into the kitten delivery area in the bedroom and all the while SaBreena kept pushing.  It's a long wait for the first one.  Sometimes with us lot in the past this bit takes FOREVER!  So ManSlave said he would go to work and do the job required and come home in time to help, except he missed the entire thing and he was only gone forty minutes!  

As soon as he closed the front door, it all happened. She gave birth to a wonderful chocolate and white girl that looks just like me!  Momma didn't need to help, except the baby was a little hard of breathing and took a while to get started, she left the baby in the bed with Mum but rubbed her vigorously to get the breath needed.  SaBreena was gobbling up placenta and went on to sever the cord.  It was amazing. The first of our generation not to need help!  Momma went to weigh the little one whilst Mum washed herself and then, out popped another, just like that. head first again like number one.  Having her hands full of kitten, Momma put the kitten in a heat pad as she was cold. This helps to warm them gently to get the digestion going.  Number two kitten was pure white with a big black cap and tail with a giant zigzag on her bum just like King Slinky.  She was crying her lungs out. 

Momma weighed kitten one and popped her back on the heatpad, Kitten two was mooching about so she got weighed too and popped on the heat pad as out shot a black and white boy kitten, head first, screaming like Dad Magnus did.  SaBreena just pulled him close, washed his face then set about trimming his umbilical.  She knew what was going on now and was on a roll.  Momma cleared the paper towels, dried the bed around her, gave her back two kittens and weighed kitten three.  Everyone was cozy and trying to find the milky bar already.  What a wonderful sight.  Not ten minutes later, she contracted and out slid a huge and very hot red and white boy.  It was such a surprise for all of us as she didn't look big enough to be carrying four.  He is a dream baby and has that fantastic look about him already, big fat ears that point east to west.  you know when you just fall in love and know exactly what his life will be. 

They have all gone from strength to strength.  Of course there are sleepless nights and days for Momma as new Mums can be a bit clumsy at first and SaBreena is no exception. With being so very exhausted, she lay on the babies more than once.  Momma cared for the weeners throughout the night, cleaning them and popping them on the nipple whilst SaBreena slept in fits and starts.  She ate raw meat and vitamin paste every two hours for two days whilst she gained strength and Momma woke throughout the nights to feed and water her and carried her to the litter trays in the kitchen as she didn't want to use the facilities upstairs, then carried her back to her babies.  Then, on day two, she went off downstairs on her own and fed herself and drank so much from the water fountain I thought she might pop all over the kitchen like a Gremlin!  

She then announced to Momma that she should like the kittens moved to the kitten pen please and sat mewling in the new kitten pen until Momma carried the handful of squealing fluff to her and there she has been all week, dedicated to her position of head queenie.  Just yesterday she allowed Filly and Robyn to visit.  It was one of those magical moments you could never recreate.  All three had their heads in the kitten pod, discussing the birth and the babies and each being so sweet to the other with licks and headbutts.  It was a sight to behold.  Even though she is very protective over her brood, she allowed her besties in for a sneaky look.  I, on the other paw, was not allowed to see them and was told to 'wait outside' the kitten pen and not to enter. Pfft. Faith had it even worse than me, she wasn't even allowed to set a paw over the threshold of the kitten room and was whakked on the face and spat at to get out!  I feel quite honoured now!  

Magnus, of course, is running about in the snow with his Dad, Ikon, screaming from the top of his lungs that he is a Daddy cat and King of Kings!  It has all gone to his head which isn't difficult as there isn't much in it!  Ikon is the laid back Grandcat that he is and soaked up the glory that was on offer and is still my mortal enemy number one!  I tried to congratulate him but he grabbed me and bit me.  ManSlave saw it and took me away.  He really does stress me out.  He can't take those big baby blues off my chartreuses', ready to go for the kill.  I have substituted Filly to take the beatings, she is sadistic enough to enjoy a good pasting and gives as good as she gets. I prefer smaller prey, like my grandchild Robyn or niece SaBreena to taunt.  Can't taunt Filly, she is tough cookie and gives Ikon the biting and kicking he enjoys! 

There is a dousing of the white stuff here today, the garden is all clinical and white.  Except for the odd Horrace digging through up to their backsides to find the nuts ManSlave has put out for them.  Just this week Ikon has a set to with Horrible Horrace himself and Horrace won! Ikon had jumped from the raised deck onto the fence, scooted along to say good morrow to Pearl and Flaire in Al-CAT-raz and there was HH in his way on his nut feeder.  Horrace threatened him with a fisty cuff in Ikon's face so he waited as HH chuffed and punched away at him and then crept, eyes down, along the fence and that's where the sneaky Horrace jumped him from behind and proceeded to kick him and rode him like one of Lester Piggot's Derby winners at Epsom, along the fence, back towards home.  He was on the final furlong when another Horrace came bounding along and fur was flying as they pasted him towards the winning post.  Bemused and shocked, Momma lifted him from the fence and checked every inch of him and gave him a dose of 'Flea Off' to ward off any freeloaders.  Ikon certainly had a good run and hasn't been on the fence since saying he has no interest in the National this season.  He is more of a flat racer than a hurdler and the winners circle is not all it cracked up to be.  First time I have eb=very seen him give in so easily! 

I am off to watch the snow fall and cover the trees and watch the little birdies with their bright plumage rummage about to feed themselves.  There is food a plenty for them at Maystar HQ and no one goes hungry, especially on a snow day.  I may be tempted to go out and make a snow cat if it gets deep enough?  I must dash, there are lamb hocks in the oven, they started cooking at 8am and will be ready soon.  They need careful guarding until then even if ManSlave says they don't.  You can't be too sure about them wandering off into someone else's  tummy if I am not there and this week there is no garlic or onions so I may even get me a little taste of the good stuff. 

I bid you fare well and to keep safe and warm.
Bastet blessing for you all. 
​Your Queen Vee =^..^=

Not a lot has happened this week.  Phew, thank heavens I hear you all breathe....  Well, that is all for the good right? Maybe not as it makes for the dullest of Blogs.  I can report, however, that my skin is in tip toppidy top condition. My coat is at the extreme of being groomed to purrfection and I am all but ready to dance the light fantastic on the world stage for you this very day.  I am breathtakingly beautiful and know it.  I kiss Momma and push my happy little face into her hand and smooch her face and make her kiss my fuzzy little head and I mew happily in her arms.  I don't like going on my back but will sit up and be munched about my face and ears.  Oh how I purr.  
​

SaBreena is growing exponentially in the belly department.  Her nips are glowing red and the milk has begun it's descent. Just on Friday night she was chased up the stairs by her own Mother,Pearl, and out popped her pregnancy plug on the stair carpet.  It was a nasty mess that Momma had to clean up and that ManSlave nearly stood in and then gagged!  This does mean that her first stage labour is under way and within a few days everything will kick off.  For now, she is settled and happy popping in and out of her kitten room. ​Just this morning I commented on how rotund she now looked and she gave me a terrific clout about my noggin for the comment.   Pfft, I was only saying!  These pregnant queens really are tetchy!  She is eating her weight in kibble and has no cravings. She is a picky feeder and subsequently will be hard to keep weigh on we think. 

Dear sweet Flaire piddled on the bed.  It was just before ManSlave collected her up in his arms, kissing her and in turn she whispers sweet nothings in his shell like.  He sat on the bed and laid back and she purred and squealed with delight as he caressed her curls and she headbutted his stubbly face and trilled at him.  Someone always has to sleep in the wet spot, right? And, so it was, he rolled right into the freshly wet linen, where the urine just lays on the surface of the bamboo coverlet and soaked into his clothes.  He was FUMING!  He also didn't know that she had done it so was cursing Pearl who was innocently sitting playing goosberry on the bedroom stool.  Momma knows it's not Pearl as she is still only peeing a ten pence piece of wee!  Both of them are outside in Al-CAT-raz due to his girlfriends peeing and Pearl's stress.  They have both been setting upon the gravid SaBreena too so that has earned them to be under lock and key.

Last night, whilst watching a film, my dearest Grand Daughter dared to sleep in my favourite bed by the radiator.  It is toasty warm there and to add to the comfort it is also best when the heated blanket is still in the basket to snooze on top of.  There was Robyn, feet in the air like a dead parrot, body like that of an otter in the eating fish position, eyes tightly shut but listening to every noise. She does suffer from FOMO so I used that to my advantage after trying the obvious of biting her exposed upturned paws.  I sat pondering, huffing and puffing and then I had me a wicked idea... I trotted out into the kitchen and routed through the toy box where right at the bottom I had hidden a yellow spring.  I keep it there in emergency kitchen lockdown as something to do.  I found said spring, announced it loudly, dropped it a few times making the tell tale spring sound on the laminate and then carefully carried it to the lounge rug and gave a holler that I had something mighily special. Just to make it known, I gave it a pat with my paw and Robyn's pixy head appears above the parapet, eyes transfixed on the spring, ears like satellite dishes.  I have her attention - this shouldn't take long...  SIGH, it took FOREVER!!! I tap the spring again, Robyn sits up alert.  We stare hard at each other and I look to the spring and back to Robyn.  Her gaze doesn't move from my eyes.  I glance down again and give the spring a little shove to send my point home.  Her eyes flicker for a second to the spring and back to me.  I pick it up in my mouth and muffle something obscure and she sits up and is really taking note now.  If only I could get her to come to the spring I could have my bed back. Double sigh. She is settling back down and no amount of mewling is shifting her.  She won that one.  I walk aimlessly back to the windowsill, pretending to sniff at this and that, jump up and bite her toes hard and Robyn flips over and clouts me back.  Gone has the respect for your elders - Millenials!

Just to inform you of today's Roast.  It was a little lamb shoulder and Momma smothered it in garlic last night meaning we could even have a taste of it today.  Now that is selfish and CatLine said she was right not to feed us alliums in our diet.  Momma said it was about as close to Veganuary we are going to get! If nothing else it smelled great and I put on 50g just licking the gravy when ManSlave's back was turned. 

Keep safe out there people of the world. The dreaded lurgy is lurking everywhere. Be more cat - wash wash wash. 

​Your loyal Queen Vee =^..^=

​ 

On the second Sunday of the month or there about, we all get a weigh in to check the health of our little bodies.  Some get weighed more than others if there is a medical reason and usually things are picked up very early.  Take for example Pearl and her vitamin B12 deficiency.  She dropped weight like a stone which is alarming, where as someone like myself with my 'water retention and big bones' is finding dieting a little hard.  I can't stop snacking, head constantly in ManSlaves face licking the smallest crumb from his chin. He thinks I love him, pfft, love....  They are starving me you know and CatLine couldn't give a hoot!  As far as weight gain goes, I only have to inhale the scent of a Sunday roast and I have jumped up 100g!

Pearl has been a model patient. Four straight months of Vitamin capsules filled with Cobalamin which were emptied into vitamin paste to disguise it's bitter taste and placed on the roof of her mouth each day.  Some days, usually if Momma is in a hurry, she gets out the poking stick.  The poking stick was borne from us galloping to the top of the cupboards and staring down at Momma. We know full well she will bring a chair over and we cringe back as our dose arrives, but this is no good, the cupboard is a safe place, so Momma devised the Poking Stick.  It's silicone end to a wooden spoon feels yucky on the fur and she has a treat waiting if we jump down to her. So a bit like a carrot stick but with less calories!  Now, when we see the Poking Stick, we jump down to get our treat and unfortunately our medication.  We can be very smart you know and very tricky all at once - no two days are the same and I have a new hiding place under the wine rack, that Poking Stick can't get in there because Momma has to sit on the floor.  I have it all sussed out you know, but she gets me in the end and my Atopica is served and I gag and retch and hunker down and feel sorry for myself for a whole minute.

Swinging briefly back to Pearl.  Her four months were up, bloods revealed she was super dooper high in B12 and a little lacking in Folate, but hardly anything. That's a bit of scale tipping the vet tells us and nothing to fear.  THEN, she went and got cystitis, Pearl not the Vet.  I mean, REALLY!  So now more medication and she is sharing with me at the moment. We are Cystease Sisters! It's great stuff and now she has it topped with a little Metacam that gives you that all over buss and brings your play time back as you don't have any pain and you can wee again in a comfortable manner.  She is better already and Momma will continue to dose her for a further week to make sure it is all gone this time and it will be unless she stresses again over calling!  AGHHHH  Just one more blood test and a pooh screen and she can be mated in Spring time if it is all favourable. 

Back to weights.  I have to commend Lillibet for her terrific weight loss.  She is svelte and sleek all over and silky smooth and has some energy again.  Faith is in Momma's bad books she gained the 100g Lillibet lost and has tipped her back into the fat cat marker weight.  She is like me, just has to sniff anything that isn't her diet food and BAM -weight gain.  Filly and Robin are neck and neck and Momma is super chuffed with Robyn as at 10months old she just wasn't gaining any substance as she wouldn't stop suckling Tyga. This in turn just stopped her growing as she needed real food.  Now Tyga is ensconced in her new abode, Robyn has steadily gained an entire kilo and is looking and feeling exceptionally heavy and weighty and now she is 13months old she has visited Magnus - we think unsuccessfully though.  Filly has helped her transition away from her Mum and Filly is now neck and neck and a very big cat and wizzed on a kilo since her arrival.  Remarkable when the dynamics change. 

Flaire never really changes weight and keeps a stable 2.8k.  She si super sleek and very muscular.  She too gets extra vitamins each day but enjoys hers and is no trouble at all.  SaBreena really likes vitamin paste, which is great as she has to have lots of it with raspberry leaf each day to aid her up and coming birth.  She has gained a tremendous amount of weight in a month. a whole half a kilo.  That's great news as she is a picky eater and trying to get her to feed the babies inside is tricky. I do hope she eats enough once they are here to feed them.  Although, she is a healthy 3k and the kittens are a good size from the scan last week with good sound throbbing heart beats. 

The boys had a bit of a Diet too, Ikon needed to lose a tiny bit as his tummy was swaying and Magnus Rex is a growing boy so he needs the little extras.  They both get vitamin paste each day and Ikon has his eye drops twice a day then a good game of chase the Tigga Towers toy afterwards to shed the pounds whilst Magnus tucks into high calorie raw food as an extra. They are leveling out at around 4.5k and both are very muscular with the exercise on the wheel.

Well, I can feel my hunger pangs returning.  I shall go and see what's in the oven today.  I think ManSlave said he has wrestled a live boar to the ground and carried it home on his shoulders.  I think not ManSlave!! Anyway it Veganuary or some such thing like that?  I hasten to add we are not vegetarian creatures, we are high protein prey monsters and soaking beans and lentils is not as rewarding as catching me a Horrible Horrace or two!  To that end Momma organised us some farmed bunnies for the mincer.  Cruel to all you Vegans out there, but a girl gotta live you know!

​All hail Queen Vee  =^..^=

The time between Kissmouse and New Ears comes with it's own nothingness, where the days blur into one and become a melded blended mush of lounging about.  Gone has the energy for toys and frolicking in boxes and paper. The body is tired of it's adventures and sleep is in order to revitalise the senses.  

We have not only said good bye to the old year and welcomed in the new year, we have also had the split from the EU and all it holds for us there.  Our food took one whole month to reach us from Germany. Usually, our food and litter is delivered in a fine flurry of 3 days.  But alas, there was a major hold up at the ports and there sat our food, along with everyone's food and gifts for days whilst poor pets went hungry all over the UK. My paw goes out to the drivers. There are no words to express that we don't even treat animals like that!  So, to that end Momma had to order some food from Amazon whose trusty driver delivered the next day.  Alas, My food was still delayed and I had to eat some other stuff made of Rabbit and Beef.  I don't like it, I am well into a bag of the stuff and still I don't like it.  My vet says I can not eat the urinary stuff anymore as it is compromising my allergies. Shame, I really liked that stuff and Momma just ordered a new bag from Germany! Suppose it may come in useful for someones dinner? 

I have pushed this food around my bowl and seemingly been put on a diet too, pfft.  Don't see ManSlave on a diet, he frequents the fridge when Momma isn't looking then won't eat his dinner!  I on the other paw, I frequent ManSlave and climb all over him for a nibble of his stolen goods. I am still not eating my diet food and refuse to be entertained by Momma cooing how yummy it is... She sprinkles fishy treats on it to make it more palatable.  YUCK. Fish, rabbit and beef in the same meal - do you think i am desperate?  It is making me more affectionate though. I can't help it, my purr monitor is all off with this hunger that just won't abate. I am finding I am doing tricks and waving my paw at every opportunity to get snack of anything that is better than the cr4p she is serving me!  On the flip side, my allergies have abated too.  If only they would tell my lesser spotted belleh the good news!

ManSlave just came an interrupted us whilst we type this out for you all.  He was taken aback as he didn't know I actually sat with Momma and fed her lines of text via my beautiful and clever eyes. He didn't realise that I do actually impart the words into her brain and she types them out for me.  Well I can't type, how else is a blog to be produced?  Filly has turned up in the office now and fancies a bit of blogging... OK, I shall give her a quick go, she does speak funny.

Well, my eyes are all a flutter with that lingo. There is certainly a bit of a divide in languages here from Polish to West Country but there it is a taste of the cute little darling and her wonderful funny nature.  She hugs Momma so tightly around the neck if she sits down long enough then bounces off to visit ManSlave in his chair and repeats the process over and over.  She is full of fun and games and never seems to tire out. Then when all is quite in the 'dimpsey' she sleeps a long deep sleep. She is nothing but funny and full of beans or Beetle Juice as Momma calls it on account of her Mother being called Dung Beetle!

As Filly said, manSlave is indeed peeling his teddies so I do will depart to see what is cooking in that majestical of lit ovens today.  We heard, or should that be herd, that ManSlave had acquired a small amount of the bovine sort for our 'gurt' Sunday lunch. I am off to press my sniffer against the glass and meditate on the smell and beg and plead with my paws until they relent and feed me something I want instead of the dried version!

​Tootleloo ye all... Your Queen Vee  =^..^=


 ​

Here we are, lounging about after filling our boots with copious amounts of Turkey.  I sat, proud oven watcher, all Xmas morning. I stalked that big bronze beast all the way from fridge to plate including the long thaw outside at one point beating Magnus into a retreat, "It's MINE." I spat.  I could hardly contain myself after the first taste and have harassed ManSlave at every opportunity for a nibble of the white stuff.  At one point I literally climbed all over him and thwakked his hand with my paw until he dropped a tiny bit which I gobbled up like a rabid feline.  Momma then put her paw down and said "Oi, Vik-A-Tori, nuffs nuff love."  I had been told, that was the fun over. Well, until she wasn't around and I had ManSlave dancing about with his arm in the air and me balanced precariously on his shoulder trying to reach a slice. Quite the symbiotic partnership. I am the Devil & him the horse as I beat his hand for sausage and bacon. I give him another kick around the ears - Gawd darn it - JUST DROP THE THING ALREADY ALREADY!

Robyn, Filly and SaBreena had a wonderful time playing with a big green mouse hut adventure toy. It dashed in and out and Robyn bit onto it's tiny body as she preempted it's peepo. She enthusiastically dragged it about the room, it's squeaking driving her bonkers and was pulling away and batting anyone who tried to pinch it.  Robyn poked her feet in and out of the holes and never mastered the fine details of the capture and skipped off to chase a spring.  SaBreena, once left alone with it, was transfixed by the motion, never seeming to pounce, then after a few minutes, she had a pattern in her minds eye and bang - mousie was captured and somewhat devoured, then the machine whisked it away and out of her mouth it flew in the opposite direction, making good it's escape right into the jaws of Robyn!

The floor is still covered in paper three days later.  It's the best time a cat can have, all that rustling and crinkling.  We dash in and out, through and under, up and over, pouncing and stalking each other.  What fun there is to be had with such simplicity.  In amongst the paper there are little fishies that are stuffed with the nip.  GrandMewMew out did her self this year with that little lot! Robyn, Pearl, SaBreena, Flaire and I had an explosive time kicking and biting those fish.  I had a kipper that was so wonderful to give a beating to.  Pearl chose a bright orange carp and off she went for big smooches on it's fat lips.  Flaire had a tiny sardine that just fitted between her paws and Robyn chose a giant trout that she carried up and down the stairs.  Momma said it was like a fishmongers without the smell!  

Filly, Ikon and Magnus were fascinated with the Flutterby Toy Santa brought us. I had a good thrash at it, but Magnus was sent dizzzy chasing it round and around.  Silly sausage made himself a tad dizzy and lay there in a Flutterby stupor swaying just a little. Momma put out the new blankies Jaz and Jamie brought them, they are very smart and warm. Lillibet got one too and has snuggled underneath it and not been seen since.  Faith has taken the opportunity to relax on Momma at every second of her sitting down and proudly wearing her adventurine collar. It is rather pretty.  Some of the really lovely and special gifts from Ireland broke in the post.  They were so adorable too, little bowls and sweet jug and teapot. I guess all they might hold now is 'holey' water.  Pfft. 

Today is a day to get up and check on the storm damage and to be fair, there is nothing much to report.  The odd piece of wood has moved and bits blown about in the garden.  Most of it was put away last night and the side gate firmly shut and the girls brought in from Al-CAT-Raz, just in case it lost it's roof. Magnus and Ikon slept right through the wind and rain all protected in their toasty house.  They come in for a few hours every day but us CatWomen mustn't be in the kitchen with them for long as Magnus starts to get his jolly on with Filly and she beats him up totally not interested.  She is a minor and just wants to play. Robyn is too transfixed by toys to be lured by his advances and he spends the entire time just sitting quietly staring at her.   He will get his turn soon.  Ikon has no interest in such matters and gives Filly as good as she gives. They do play well. 

SaBreena is growing and her belly swelling.  She is now about to embark on her third trimester tomorrow and this is when the fun begins and where she really comes into her own.  She has access to the kitten room any time through the cat flap and can lay and eat and scratch about in the bedding and make nests.  It is a daunting prospect and we are both looking forward to it and dreading it in equal measure.   There are more than fifty enquiries about kittens and over 200 that Momma has disregarded totally as unsuitable. Plus, she will only have a small number in there and there are serious folks waiting. 

Right, that's me done, I am off to the kitchen, I can hear that the boys have had their time out and heading back to The House of Fun until later.  So I shall go and check out the luncheon situation as we are sure to get a nibble of day three turkey.  I love Christmas - Turkey EVERYDAY.  What lucky pussers we all are. You can hold the veg though. Don't need any greenery ta everso. You can keep your brussles and your cabbage in favour of a sausage or two... And anyway, Vegetables are so poorly treated, it is a terrible thing, grown int he wild and yanked from their beds to live in tiny boxes and the refrigerated until they can't run away.  It's apaw show that!  These vegans are all very well with their nuts n stuff, but for me, it's Turkey! 

​Gobble Gobble from your Queen Vee =^..^=